The Trial of Steven Shmuel Krawatsky: Day Two Part 2

Continuing in our coverage of the Krawatsky trial, after lunch on the second day, Shannon Pulsipher, one of the CPS social workers who investigated the allegations against Rabbi Krawatsky, was called by Annie Alonso.

Shannon Pulsipher is a CPS worker who worked for Frederick County CPS for almost 17 years, including 2015. She received training in investigating child sexual abuse, physical abuse, neglect, and how to recognize grooming. She was also educated in proper interviewing techniques for child victims of sexual abuse, including asking open-ended questions, not asking yes/no questions, and not asking leading questions.

Pulsipher testified that she did an interview with the first alleged victim at the Child Advocacy center that wasn’t recorded per state’s attorney’s rules at the time. Child Advocacy Centers are places where children can be brought for evaluation of any disclosed or suspected abuse, receive resources to help them, and meet with social workers. She said that the first alleged victim made a disclosure during that investigation.

Following the interview, she said, she spoke to the first alleged victim’s parents, as well as Krawatsky (on 9/2/15) and the second alleged victim(on 8/24/15), and compiled a report within 30 days. She said that when she spoke to the second alleged victim it was at his house, at his father’s request, with his father present. She said she made no mention of the existing allegations before the meeting. She was accompanied to that meeting, she said, by detective Davies who was not in uniform but was armed. She said Davies was also at Krawatsky’s interview, which was not recorded as per standard practice in Frederick county at the time.

She said she asked several questions of K and at one point he said that he would never expel someone from camp, but said that he ultimately had to expel the second alleged victim for hitting another kid in camp. She said she asked Krawatsky about tickling kids and Krawatsky said the most he would do is give high fives. At no point, she said, did he mention that he had physically held the second alleged victim during a meltdown (despite it having already been established that he carried the second alleged victim to his mother). According to Pulsipher, Krawatsky also denied every discussing Lashon Hara with with the second alleged victim.

After that interview, she said, she spoke with the camp directors, including Rabbi Dave Finkelstein, as is typical in such an investigation to get an idea of how the camp functions. Her impressions of Rabbi Dave, she said, were frustrating because he had unethically done things he shouldn’t have in doing his own investigation into the allegations which she had never told him to do. She said she hadn’t wanted him to talk to anyone about it and he still did.

She said she then went back to Shoresh with Detective Davies and the first alleged victim on 9/8/15 to revisit the location where the abuse allegedly happened. She said she was not otherwise familiar with Shoresh before this case.

Present at the camp, she said, were her, Davies, who was armed, the first alleged victim, his father, and Rabbi Dave. Camp was not in session at the time. She said that she, Davies, and the first alleged victim went inside the locker room and walked through, allowing the first alleged victim to point out where things occurred in the room. She said that neither she nor Davies forced him to say anything then or ever. While they were inside, she said, his father and Rabbi Dave waited outside.

Following this, she said, they all left the camp. She said she then spoke to the second alleged victim’s therapist about his client, but not about the first alleged victim. She said the purpose of meeting with the therapist was because the second alleged victim was seeing him about his behavioral issues and the families of the first and second alleged victims had decided to have a meeting with the therapist and see how it went. She said she doesn’t remember if she was there when the playdate happened, but she was there with the second alleged victim and the therapist. She said she didn’t remember seeing the first alleged victim’s mother in the room with the second alleged victim.

She said that at the time the second alleged victim did not disclose and said he didn’t remember anything. She said she wrote reports in both cases – the first and second alleged victims. She said that in her report about the first alleged victim she indicated Krawatsky for abuse, and in the report for the second alleged victim she found it unsubstantiated. She explained that indicated means they have sufficient evidence to believe sexual abuse occurred, and unsubstantiated means they believe something happened but can’t quite prove it.

Following a settlement agreement, she said, the indicated finding in the first alleged victim’s case was downgraded to unsubstantiated, but the unsubstantiated finding in the second alleged victim’s case never changed. She said that unsubstantiated reports stay in the system so if another kid comes forward they still have it. She said she wasn’t involved in the third alleged victim’s case, and that after the appeal in the first two cases she was no longer involved at all.

Next Pulsipher was cross examined by Chris Rolle.

He started by asking her to clarify what happens when a case in found to be unsubstantiated by CPS and whether it stays confidential. She confirmed that it did. He then asked if someone applied for a job with a child while having an unsubstantiated finding they’d still be able to get the job since it’s a private matter. She answered that it’s up to the school, but didn’t know if the school would be able to find out about the finding.

Regarding the locker room walkthrough at Shoresh he asked her why she wanted to do that. She said she just wanted to see it for clarity. He asked her if she was there the whole time, and she said yes. He then set the scene for a question: The 5 of them (Pulsipher, Davies, Rabbi Dave, the first alleged victim, and his father) met outside the locker room, then she, the first alleged victim, and Davies went inside while the father and Rabbi Dave stayed outside – How long was she inside? She said 10-ish minutes.

He asked her if she left the locker room at all during that meeting and she said no. He asked if Rabbi Dave came in and she said no. He asked her if she was at any time aware of Davies taking his gun out of his holster, or threatening the first alleged victim with it, and she said no. He asked her if that was ridiculous, and there was a sustained objection to that question. He asked her if she’d remember seeing that and she said yes.

He asked her if she saw Davies tell the first alleged victim to stop lying and withdraw his statement and she said no.

He then asked her if she was involved in arranging the playdate at the therapist’s office and she said she wasn’t and had no knowledge if it happening. She said she didn’t recall the father of the second alleged victim including her in emails about it and said she didn’t recall being involved in any emails about it at all. She said she found out about the playdates after they happened and that she received no videos of then.

He asked her if she was aware of the recording the second alleged victim’s mother had made of his disclosure and she said no and that she’d never heard it.

He then asked her what the purpose of her meeting at the therapist’s office was and she said it was because the second alleged victim was ready to talk. He asked her if the objective was to get more information from the second alleged victim and she said maybe. He asked her if she had reason to believe the second alleged victim had different information this time than the first time she’d spoken to him and she said that she hadn’t but if he was talking to his doctor she wanted to hear what he was saying.

He asked her if it was usual to do a second interview with a child and she said no. He asked her if it was clear at that second meeting that the second alleged victim was saying he didn’t remember any abuse, and she said yes. He asked her if that was why the finding was ultimately unsubstantiated and she said yes. He asked her if the unsubstantiated finding was because there was no physical evidence and no indication the abuse actually happened, and she said no, his behaviors showed differently than what he was saying and his answers showed differently.

He then asked her if she was aware that the second alleged victim’s family had had a house fire in fall 2015 that had displaced them to a hotel, and she said yes. He then asked her if she was aware that the second alleged victim had been prescribed a very powerful medication that he had had a severe allergic reaction to that had resulted in him being hospitalized and she said no.

He then asked her if she was aware that he had been expelled from camp for hitting another child and that Krawatsky had been involved in the incident and she said yes. He asked her there was any other evidence other than what the first alleged victim said about what the second alleged victim had experienced and the second alleged victim’s behaviors that caused her to find the allegations unsubstantiated (as opposed to ruled out) and she said that the second alleged behaviors at the first interview and what his parents said were enough.

Rolle ended his cross examination and Annie Alonso redirected.

Alonso asked her if an unsubstantiated finding means something could have happened, and she said yes. Alonso asked if gift giving is an indication of abuse and she said yes.

Pulsipher was excused from the stand.

Next Annie Alonso called the father of the first alleged victim.

The father of the first alleged victim said he lived in Baltimore from 2006 to 2016 because he had a job in Washington DC, and as an Orthodox Jewish family he wanted an Orthodox community to live in. He described Orthodox communities as being tight-knit, and said that Baltimore was the biggest community close to DC. He described growing up as a traditional Conservative Jew and befriending an Orthodox schoolmate at college who invited him to Orthodox services. He said he became Orthodox in 1997 or 1998.

He described Orthodox Judaism as looking similar to Conservative in some traditional ways, but in Conservative Judaism you do the things that are meaningful to you and give you a sense of connection to God and the Jewish people, whereas in Orthodoxy you follow everything more strictly and the connection comes on its own. He said he is no longer Orthodox.

Regarding Shoresh he said that he sent two of his older kids in 2014 and then sent his next son, the first alleged victim, there in 2015. He said he chose Shoresh because his sister sent her kids there, he knew it was Orthodox, and given how few family experiences Orthodox families get to have he wanted them all to have a nice family experience with Shoresh.

He said that his sister was the mother of the third alleged victim.

He said that for the first year the kids loved camp, which is why he chose to send them back. He said that he felt they were becoming part of the Shoresh Family and participated in Shoresh events during the school year as well. He said his older kids also loved attending Shoresh in 2015.

He said his younger son, the first alleged victim, really enjoyed it at first – he came home every day tired because of the long drive each way, but he really enjoyed the first few days. After the first week, he said, he noticed his son wasn’t eating a lot of breakfast, and that while his son had always been the most even tempered of his children he started fighting with everyone, not eating, repeatedly going to the bathroom and running around in the middle of the night, and saying weird and concerning things about camp. He said this all started around the second week of camp.

He said that prior to Shoresh he didn’t know Krawatsky, but that when he saw the behavioral changes he did think it involved Krawatsky at the time because he was under the impression that Krawatsky was making his son uncomfortable, but he said he didn’t address it at the time. He said he had some concerns about Krawatsky after hearing about disciplinary issues at the camp. He said he was concerned that Shoresh wasn’t a well-run cam from a discipline standpoint and didn’t want to send his kids back the following year.

Right after camp ended, he said, his son’s behavior kept deteriorating to the point where they went on a family hike to Sugarloaf Mountain, which his son generally loved, but he kept running into the woods to run toward the edge. He said that he kept telling his son that he’d fall off if he kept doing that but his son didn’t seem to care if he fell off the mountain. He said his son was fighting with his siblings during the hike, and didn’t seem like the same kid he’d sent to camp.

Two days later, he said, he was sleeping and his wife came in and told him about the dream their son had just disclosed to her. He said he had been concerned about the discipline in general in the camp, but this dream was horrifying. He then said he had a discussion with his son to see if it was just a dream or if something had happened.

After hearing about the dream on Tuesday of that week, he said, he and his wife discussed next steps. He said they contacted Rabbi Dave because as a practicing Orthodox Jew they have their own internal system of justice, their own internal courts, security, and they have a strong Jewish tradition not to report things to police or secular authorities without permission from a rabbi. He said that the term for someone who violates these rules is called a Moser (informer, rat).

He said he had known Rabbi Dave before this and had seen him at shul and around in the community, and when his sister said she was sending her kids to Shoresh he reached out to Rabbi Dave at shul to ask about Shoresh since he was the camp director. He said he reached out to Rabbi Dave about the abuse on Wednesday of that week, had a second call with him on Friday, and met with him on Shabbos.

He brought his son on Shabbos, he said, with him to Rabbi Dave’s house, which doubles as the Shoresh office. He said he stayed with his son the whole time, and that his son appeared upset during the whole meeting. Dave didn’t take it seriously, he said.

The following Tuesday, he said, CPS called him regarding the allegations, and his son was interviewed by CPS. Afterwards, he said, he was asked by Pulsipher to bring his son to Shoresh for a second interview. He didn’t really want to, he said, but was trying to do what CPS told him. He said he had concerns about the meeting there, especially about bringing his son back to the scene where the alleged assault happened, and he expressed his concerns about Rabbi Dave’s presence at this meeting and asked Pulsipher not to allow Dave to be present.

The meeting, he said, ended up consisting of him, his son, Davies, Pulsipher, and Rabbi Dave. He arrived with his son, he said, and they went to the field entrance of the locker room. He said that he and Rabbi Dave stood outside while Pulsipher, Davies, and his son went in. He said that he stayed outside with Rabbi Dave for a time, and had no firsthand knowledge of what happened inside. At some point, he said, everyone finally came out and they all left.

He said he was advised leter that CPS had closed its investigation after indicating Krawatsky for abusing his son. That, he said, opened the door for his son to start getting treatment.

He said he was aware that the finding was later changed to unsubstantiated after an appeal by Krawatsky.

He didn’t know the second alleged victim’s father at the time. He said that he has known him since around September of 2015 when they first communicated. He said he initially learned about the second alleged victim’s father from Rabbi Dave, looked him up on LinkedIn, and found that both were working as engineers in the field of optoelectronics.

He said he didn’t know the second alleged victim’s therapist at the time. He said he was first connected to the therapist as his son was doing worse and worse and kept asking him to see the second alleged victim. He said he was hoping that after the case was closed he could help his kid heal. He said he tried getting the two kids together, and the father of the second alleged victim thought it would be best to happen in a supervised setting and suggested his son’s therapist.

The first alleged victim’s father said he communicated with the therapist by email to understand the plan since the therapist wasn’t his son’s therapist. He didn’t feel that this joint session was ideal for his son, but if it could help his own son, and the second alleged victim’s father wanted it too, he felt it should let it happen. He described the goal of the meeting as helping to heal his own son, as well as the second alleged victim who had been kicked out of school at that point.

He said he was not in the room with the therapist and the boys, but in the waiting area where he couldn’t hear what was happening. After the meeting, he said, he didn’t see his wife talk to the second alleged victim. He did say he knew it happened, just not firsthand.

Moving on to his sister he said he doesn’t talk to her much and can’t remember the last time they spoke, maybe just once a year, but not often. When they all lived in Maryland, he said, they were much closer, and spent most Sundays hiking together, and meeting at their parents’ house so the cousins could spend the day together. Their sons, the first and third alleged victims, got along well together and with the third alleged victim’s brother.

He said he took the actions he took after hearing his son’s allegations because he’s his son’s father and he’s the only one who could defend and protect him in this world. What he did, he said, he did to keep him safe not only from physical harm, but also to help him with the emotional pain he was in.

Direct examination ended and Benjamin Kurtz cross examined him.

Kurtz began by asking the father of the first alleged victim about what he’d said about not talking to his sister in a year, asking him if he remembered his sister being at his son’s deposition four months prior to the trial. He said he didn’t remember her being there .

(Kurtz did this a lot during cross-examination: Asking questions that seemingly directly contradicted what the witness had testified and asking so confidently that anyone watching might be sure he’d have some evidence to refute any denial of his assertions, but then never actually contradicting them with evidence.)

Regarding the emails sent between him and the therapist in arranging the playdates Kurtz showed him the emails and asked him if he saw in the recipients’ address list any mention of Pulsipher or Davies. He said he didn’t. Kurtz then tried to get the emails entered into evidence, something that had already been agreed to before trial wouldn’t happen, and there was an immediate objection, sidebar, and then sustaining of the objection. Kurtz also tried to pull similar moves several times.

Moving on to camp in 2015, Kurtz asked him how many sessions his son attended that summer. He answered that his son left after first session. Kurtz then asked him if the disclosure happened in August and he said no, it happened after close of second session in August.

Regarding the dream his son initially disclosed, Kurtz asked him about the timeline of that disclosure. He said that the dream happened after the second alleged victim was expelled from camp. He said that the dream was at first about Krawatsky urinating in front of his son, which as disclosed to his wife, who then ran down the hall to tell him about it. He said he then went to his son to see what was happening, and his son was describing that it wasn’t just a dream, that he’d seen Krawatsky naked.

He said that this disclosure of Krawatsky being naked happened the next morning. Kurtz asked him if he’d ever testified to that before, and he said that he didn’t know, he’d been asked to describe this many times, and it was a couple of days in all of them trying to figure out what happened. Kurtz asked him if he was an intelligent guy who remembers things, and he said yes to the best of his ability. Kurtz asked him if he had any memory issues, and he (jokingly) said he hoped not.

(Kurtz, as usual, was doing his best to once again seem like a belligerent prick to the father of the first alleged victim.)

Kurtz asked him if he remembered his depositions and his conversations with the CPS workers and detectives, and he said yes. Kurtz then asked him if he’d ever before stated before that day that his son’s dream “morphed” into a real thing that happened the same morning, to which an objection was made and sustained.

Kurtz then asked him if he recalled before that day ever saying that it was more than a dream the next morning, and he said that he had said that to Davies outside the CPS interview room during the initial CPS interview. Kurtz asked him if there was a recording any other time he told this story – to detective Davies, or in depositions – and he said he didn’t remember.

Kurtz then asked him about taking his son to the camp with Pulsipher, Rabbi Dave, and detective davies and asked him if he’d found out since that day that his son had claimed he was threatened by Davies at gunpoint, and he said yes. Kurtz asked him if he believed his son about that, and he said that be believed his son was terrified. Kurtz pushed on saying that wasn’t what he’d asking, and the father of the first alleged victim said he didn’t believe a 7 year old could tell the difference between a detective with a gun and being at gunpoint, and that he believed his son’s terror and that he was scared, but didn’t know exactly what happened.

Kurtz asked him if he tried getting Davies investigated by state police, and he said yes. Kurtz asked him if that meant he had believed what that accusation from his son against Davies, and he said yes (referring back to what he said about believing how his son felt). Kurtz then asked him if he was aware that Pulsipher was in the room the entire time (attempting to impeach his testimony regarding believing how his son felt), and he said that that wasn’t his testimony (meaning he wasn’t referring to what actually happened) it was her testimony.

Kurtz then asked him if he though Pulsipher was lying, and there was a sustained objection. Kurtz asked if he thought she was mistaken, and there was another sustained objection.

Kurtz moved on to ask him if there was a time when the investigations were all over, the findings were unsubstantiated and it was clear no charges were being filed, and he said that he wasn’t trying to be coy but there had been a lot of gates in that question that he didn’t fully understand. Kurtz then said he was sure he wasn’t, and asked him if in 2017 there was a time he started talking to Chaim Levin, and (after a sidebar and an overruled objection) he said yes. Kurz then followed up to confirm that every investigative avenue had closed and there was no more investigation from CPS or possibility of criminal prosecution, and he said yes.

Kurtz then asked him if he reported Krawatsky to the FBI and NCMEC, and he said yes. Kurtz asked if anything came from those reports, and he said he got a call back from Moe Greenberg of the Baltimore county police. Kurtz asked if anything legal came from that and he said he wouldn’t know. Kurtz asked if he’d gone to a hearing or trial after that and he said no. Kurtz asked him if he’d be aware of a trial and he said yes, but that he wouldn’t be aware if the FBI had maintained a file.

Cross examination ended and Annie Alonso redirected.

She asked him why he waited for Shabbos to go see Rabbi Dave, and he said that that was when Rabbi Dave had asked him to come for his investigation. She asked about Kurtz’ question about meeting his sister at the deposition and asked if he coordinated those depositions. He said he didn’t remember seeing her and if he had it had only been in passing.

Redirect ended.

Next a video deposition in lieu of live testimony (de bene esse) was played of Kovi Barron, counselor of the third alleged victim and his brother in 2015. Kovi said that his last job was at Shoresh, aside from volunteering at hospitals and shadowing doctors. He said it was his dream job to go to medical school and that he still might.

He said he worked at Shoresh around 2013-2015 when he was around 18 years old. He said he was 27 at the time of recording. He said that he had been employed initially as ropes course counselor during his first year at Shoresh and was a counselor for the lower boys division during his second year. He said that there were about 10-12 campers per bunk in that division and that on average each bunk had two counselors, one senior and one junior. He said that his bunk was bunk gimmel.

He said that he remembered the third alleged victim and his brother. He said he was trying to remember who was who, but that both were mischievous. One, he said, was not so great at sports and liked to run around and catch frogs during baseball, and would occasional jump on the ski ball machines to get the balls in the holes. He remembered the campers in his bunk being post-2nd grade, so around 7-8 years old.

He said the last time he spoke to the family of the third alleged victim was when he worked at Shoresh. He was asked about another child, and said he remembered that child was special needs and always had another counselor with him to help him if he couldn’t do the scheduled activity on his own, or to help him at lunchtime.

He was then asked about some notes on the camper roster indicating when campers were scheduled to be absent from camp, specifically if there was ever a week that the special needs camper with the shadow was scheduled not to be there. He said no. He said that when he worked at Shoresh he didn’t see any instances of staff inappropriately touching, kissing, massaging, letting campers sit in their lap, butt slapping, spanking, or physically punishing any campers. He said that if he’d seen any of those he’d have immediately gone to head staff and called child services, or whatever number was given to him by the camp.

He was handed a copy of the staff handbook and asked to read parts of it. The first part had to do with general responsibilities, and he read a section saying that staff should give each camper attention so everyone enjoys camp activities. He was asked if he was attentive and answered yes. Next he read a section about giving campers attention to keep them safe and asked if he at any point was concerned for the safety of any of his campers in 2015. He said no, including regarding the third alleged victim.

Next he read a section saying that during swimming a counselor must be in the pool with the kids unless they were a designated watcher, and when asked what that was he said lifeguard. He described his role during swim as being in the pool with the kids and giving swim lessons and said that if anyone had an issue requiring them to leave, his co-counselor would deal with that.

He was then asked about directives in the handbook about missing campers and asked if in 2015 there were any concerns about a missing camper in his bunk. He said no. He was then asked about the directive for lost swimmers and if he remembered what buddy check policy for swimming was, and he said he didn’t remember. He said he never recalled a time when he was in the pool that swimming was stopped because a camper was missing.

He was then handed a daily schedule and asked if it was accurate. He said it was. He said that generally his bunk was assigned swim first activity in the morning but that sometimes it varied if they went on a trip. He said that before swimming there was davening and learning after which all the bunks separated into their scheduled activities.

Swimming, he said, was 50 minutes from 10:20 to 11:10 AM, and that during that slot there were 5 lower boys bunks (All of them) at the pool, around 60 campers on average and around 10 counselors as well as head counselors and lifeguards. He described the pool as being closer to the main building, outside, the closest building before the baseball, archery, and ropes course fields and the arts and crafts building, and that there was a boys locker room near the pool.

In describing the morning swim sessions he said that they’d wait outside if anyone was inside changing, but generally they were the first ones there since swim was scheduled first activity for them, and then the boys would go into the changing area to change, and the counselors would go change in the bathroom or shower room separately, and then everyone would go out to the pool. He reiterated that the staff changed separately from the campers.

Before leaving the locker room, he said, they had to make sure all the campers had changed and left the locker room.

Next he was shown a series of pictures of the locker room. He was asked where the campers changed and indicated an area with bathrooms but said that it was a whole mush. He then said that not all 5 bunks would change at once. Each bunk, he said, would wait outside until the previous bunk had finished changed and exited the locker room at which point they’d go in, change, and exit to the pool.

He was then shown a picture of the hallway that led from the entrance at the far end of the locker room to the exit that led out to the pool area and confirmed that one could see all the way from one end of the room to the other. He was then asked about where a bunk would go to use the bathroom if they were playing sports and he said that they would have to go back to the main building, not the bathroom, to avoid the risk of running into the girls using the locker room. He then mentioned that the girls had a separate locker room in the same building.

He then said that if during swim a camper needed to use the bathroom they’d be escorted there by a counselor.

He then said that the counselors would change to get ready for swimming either in the bathroom or shower stalls. He then said that when he worked at Shoresh he had never seen Krawatsky change in front of campers. He said he didn’t know where Krawatsky did change, but he had never seen him walking around naked, propositioning a camper, sexually assault a camper anywhere, and that during his time as a counselor he never saw any suspected signs of child abuse.

He was then made available to questions from the other attorneys present. First was Chris Rolle, one of Krawatsky’s lawyers. Rolle asked him if he was Krawatsky’s direct report, and he said that Krawatsky was head of lower boy’s division and that there were a few others for the lower boys division and a number of head counselors like Rabbi Dave and others. Rolle asked him to confirm if Krawatsky was a head counselor working with him and in charge of the same things he was in charge of, and he said yes.

Asked to describe Krawatsky’s interactions with the kids he said that Krawatsky was a fun guy, fun personality, always truing to make everyone lively and happy, that he was the life of the party and that if anyone seemed down Krawatsky tried to lift their spirits. He said that he had never seen Krawatsky act inappropriately with a child, have physical contact with a child (despite it having already been established that Krawatsky had carried the second alleged victim to his mother), or have kids on his lap.

He said that during swim Krawatsky was either at the pool swimming or on the side just making things fun, and that he was in charge of swim time. He said he had never seen Krawatsky leave the area or go off by himself, or seen Krawatsky in the locker room at all, walked in on Krawatsky naked, seen him changing in the locker room, or seen a child go into the locker room alone during swim. He said that if he’d seen a child entering the locker room alone he’d have sent a counselor after him because such a thing would be concerning to him.

He said that he never left a camper alone in the locker room and never would because if a kid refused to swim he would have to stay by the pool anyway. He said he’d never seen a child alone in the locker room. He also said that he had never heard a child inside from the outside or seen anyone naked in the locker room. He said that being well versed in Jewish religion and customs, and being that Shoresh was an Orthodox camp, it wouldn’t make sense for someone to be walking around naked in the locker room.

He said he only worked there during the summer.

He was then questioned by the families’ lawyers.

He was asked if when a camper would be escorted from the swim area back to the locker room to use the bathroom the counselor would wait outside the locker room, and he said yes. He said that the last time he spoke to the lawyers for Shoresh or Krawatsky was when he worked at Shoresh. Asked about a specific lawyer for Shoresh he said that the first time he’d spoken to him was a month or so before the taped deposition.

He said that the lawyer was trying to get ahold of all the counselors so they could have word with them to see if they remembered anything about the case. He said they asked him if he could speak and they did a few times by phone about what was going on, when he should be available for the case since he lived in Israel, and to introduce the idea of a video deposition like the one he was taking. Each call, he said, was around 10-20 minutes during which they discussed his testimony. He said they never met in person.

He was asked about the number of boys and girls in each division (by gender, not age levels within each gender division) and he said it was a lot of kids, around 240 kids, so he couldn’t have been around them all all the time. He also said he couldn’t always see where Krawatsky was at all times. Regarding times a camper needed discipline during swim he said that it was never his job to discipline kids and that maybe the lifeguard would blow a whistle or something.

He said he never saw a kid try to drown another kid, including the third alleged victim (Krawatsky had, according to the third alleged victim’s mother’s testimony on the first day, called her regarding her son attempting to drown another child. The implication was that if he hadn’t seen something that had already been established to have happened, what else might he have not seen?).

He was asked about his schedule for giving swim lessons and said it wasn’t every day. He was asked if he was allowed to make calls during the sabbath and said he wasn’t. He was asked about his first contact with the Shoresh lawyer who had reached out about testifying and said that he had gotten a missed call from the lawyer on Shabbos and couldn’t pick and and had played phone tag with him for a little bit. When they finally connected, he said, he was asked if he’d be available to give a deposition for the case.

He said the lawyer told him no facts or opinions on the case, and then tried asking the lawyer why he asked him about the halacha around answering calls on Shabbos, that that was pretty random.

The deposition ended, as did that day of trial.

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The Trial of Steven Shmuel Krawatsky: Day Two Part 1

The second day of the Krawatsky trial began with the second alleged victim being called to the stand by Jon Little. He was accompanied by his service dog, Maisie. The second alleged victim is currently 15 years old.

He began by saying that he went to Shoresh and did not have a good time. He didn’t remember how his initial contact with Krawatsky came about, but remembers Krawatsky being there as a counselor and identified him in the courtroom. He said he was at Shoresh for 2014 and 2015 and wasn’t excited to return the second year but doesn’t remember why.

After summer of 2014 he says he remembers having outbursts and starting to wet the bed again. He said he went back in 2015 and describes an incident where he was in a bathroom stall urinating and Krawatsky walked in wearing swim trunks, pulled them down exposing his penis, and then offered the second alleged victim $100 to touch his penis. He said he remembered no other incidents with Krawatsky.

He said he remembered seeing his then-therapist but doesn’t remember if he saw him before Shoresh. He said he knew the first alleged victim’s mother by name but not personally, and that he knows the first alleged victim but hasn’t seen him in a very long time. He said he remembers one session with his therapist and the first alleged victim, but doesn’t remember discussing what happened at camp with the first alleged victim, his therapist, or the first alleged victim’s mother, and also doesn’t recall talking to CPS about the case.

He did, however, say he remembered being given gifts by Krawatsky. Little then produced a ceramic plate and showed it to him. He recognized the exhibit as having been given to him by Krawatsky after a ceramics class at camp where he didn’t like the dish he’d made, and Krawatsky gave him a a plate instead. The plate said “Rabbi K” on it, and the second alleged victim said he didn’t write that there himself.

Benjamin Kurtz then rose to cross-examine him. His demeanor, as always, was combative.

Kurtz started by asking him if he was alone by the pool area where the alleged abuse happened. He said yes. Kurtz asked him if the first alleged victim was there, and he said he didn’t remember. Kurtz then started badgering him about what happened to him, asking if he remembered his prior depositions, if he remembers the first alleged victim being there with him, if he ever saw him being violated. He said he remembered the depositions but didn’t remember any details about the first alleged victim.

Kurtz then asked him if he remembered being raped repeatedly (which is not what he testified to on direct examination), and he said he didn’t remember being raped, repeatedly or otherwise.

Kurtz then moved in to ask him about the statement he made about Krawatsky pulling his pants down in the locker room, asking him if that testimony was the first time he mentioned that fact. He said that he didn’t think so. When Kurtz asked him when else he said it, he said he thought in one of the previous depositions.

Kurtz then showed him a deposition to refresh his recollection. After reading it Kurtz asked him if he now remembered saying that, and he said that yes, he just remembered having said it. Kurtz asked him if he had just remembered that day for the first time that Krawatsky was naked, to which Little objected and was sustained.

Kurtz then asked if it true he denied being touched from 2015-2016. That was objected to as well and the objection was sustained. Kurtz then asked if he recalled his parents and CPS talking to him in 2015, and if he remembered how he made his disclosure. He said he didn’t remember. Kurtz then asked about how often he talks about the allegations with other people, and he answered that he only talked about it in depositions, and maybe once with his therapist.

After cross examination, Little redirected to ask him to look at the deposition and see if he was ever asked about Krawatsky being naked. He answered no.

Little then called the father of the second alleged victim. The father is a well educated, well-spoken, affable person. He described choosing Shoresh because they knew some people who sent their kids there, and from the promos they saw it looked like a good place. Asked about why he sent his kids to an Orthodox camp when he and his family aren’t, he said that he liked what he saw with Shoresh and didn’t mind his kids seeing the other side.

He talked a little about the Orthodox community in general, saying that they tend to consult with rabbis more about both personal and legal matters, and feel it’s more important to prioritize Jewish law over secular law. He was asked if Orthodox Jews would consult with a rabbi before going to authorities, but that was objected to and the objection was sustained.

Talking about his son’s behavioral issues he said that his son had had some behavioral issues before Shoresh, and he suspected his son had ADHD because his other child did too, and sometimes he didn’t want to do assignments, but that everything got much worse after Shoresh, more explosive, in a way it never was prior. He discussed a specific instance in 2015 when they were discussing which camps the kids would go to and he told his son he’d be going back to Shoresh, a few days later the school called him to tell him his son was having an episode, being rude to teachers, and disruptive, which is when he noticed the shift in behavior.

He said his son didn’t say what was going on, but they put him in therapy, and he started ADHD meds. For the first three weeks his son was back in Shoresh, he said, his wife was working in the camp at the time so perhaps there were small issues he wasn’t made aware of because she could resolve them, but he wasn’t made aware of any issues. Then after 3 weeks, he said, they started noticing bedwetting, soiling the pants during the day, avoiding public spaces, and refusing to walk into any locker rooms even at other pools at friends’ houses.

He said his son attended the second month of Shoresh but was expelled two weeks in after being carried over to his mother by a staff member (Krawatsky) following a fight with another camper. He described Rabbi Dave Finkelstein calling after the expulsion to express concern and offer help, which he said he appreciated at first.

After session ended, right before CPS called him, Rabbi Dave called him again on his cell. CPS then called the next day to schedule a meeting to talk with him and is son. He said he scheduled the meeting for the following week after a planned trip with the family. On that trip he said that his son refused to go into any of the public bathrooms when the stopped and that he’d rather soil himself than use one. He said his son used the bathroom at the hotel, and wet the bed a bit, but absolutely refused to use any public bathrooms.

After returning, he said, they met with CPS in their home where they asked his son if Krawatsky had offered him money to touch his penis. The father said they weren’t prepared for such questions because he’d been given the impression by Rabbi Dave during the second call the night before CPS called that they’d be calling about an incident of physical violence with another child. He said that was the first time they heard about anything sexual happening.

After the meeting with CPS, he said, Rabbi Dave tried calling multiple times, as well as his son’s counselor calling several times. They didn’t pick up either of them. During his second cal with Rabbi Dave he’d gotten the impression that there was an issue with another kid, but he only figured out which kid after the father of the first alleged victim reached out to him on LinkedIn, trying to connect. The two were in the same industry so they had a lot of professional overlap.

The two spoke a few times by phone and finally met at the first CPS hearing where his son was still saying nothing happened. Following that hearing the two decided that they should have both their kids, who seemed to have been affected at camp, do something together. They proposed the idea to the second alleged victim’s therapist, and the therapist reached out to CPS and police to help decide if and how to make it happen.

They finally decided on the first supervised playdate at the therapist’s office to be held on November 22, 2015. The two kids were in the room with the therapist observing them. The first alleged victim’s mother was not present. He said they learned nothing from that first playdate so they arranged a second for a week or so later. The same people were present, he said, the session was recorded, and in that session the therapist asked him to go in and sit inside during the session. He said the therapist told him that he’d picked up on two things that indicate abuse happened.

He said the conversation between him and the therapist following the playdate was recorded, and following that conversation the therapist explained what happened to the father of the first alleged victim. The mother of the first alleged victim, who was at the office but not inside the playdate, asked if she could talk to the second alleged victim to try and get him to open up. He said that at first the therapist didn’t like that idea since he didn’t see the value, but she insisted, and the father of the second alleged victim agreed to let her talk to him just in case it helped.

He said he watched her talking to his son. He said she was intense, but not yelling, perhaps raised her voice, but he didn’t feel his son was afraid, intimidated, or scared of her. He said they spoke for less than 5 minutes. He said the discussion was not recorded.

After that he said he spoke with the first alleged victims’ mother a couple of times in person at their house, at dinner, and two CPS hearings, and on the phone about 10-15 times. He said he spoke to the first alleged victim’s father a little more, mainly by phone but also at industry conferences they both attended, mostly not about the abuse though.

He was asked to give his thoughts on Lashon Hara and explained it means evil speaking, saying bad things about someone that aren’t correct, and defaming him.

Asked why he wanted the initial CPS meeting with his son at their house and not at a Child Advocacy Center (CAC) he said that they offered both options and his son had an appointment with his doctor that morning so home was easier.

He was then cross examined by Benjamin Kurtz.

Kurtz began by asking him about his wife’s employment at Shoresh. The father said his wife worked there the whole time his kids were at Shoresh. He said his son had attended Shoresh in 2013 as well but that there had been no outbursts prior to 2014.

Then Kurtz started doing his Kurtz thing again of being combative with parents of alleged victims. Kurtz asked him about an incident involving his son flipping a piece of furniture over in school, which led to the classroom being cleared. He said he didn’t remember the particulars. Kurtz then asked him if his son was expelled for violence, and he said he didn’t know the exact reason.

Kurtz asked him how he didn’t know if his wife worked there, and he said he knows it was something between his son and another kid, that he hit him or fought or something. Kurtz sarcastically asked him about the incident he didn’t remember if his kid flipped a desk and if it happened in March 2014. He said no. Kurtz then asked him what did happen in March of 2014, and he said that he got a call from his son’s teacher saying his son was refusing to do assignments and being rude to the teacher.

Kurtz asked him to confirm that this was before he had any incidents with Rabbi K, and he said yes. Kurtz asked him if that incident at school necessitated him coming to get his son during the day, and he said no, he just had to come see the teacher after school, that the room wasn’t cleared and his son wasn’t kicked out.

He said that in 2015, after camp, is when the incident happened at school that necessitated the room being cleared.

Kurtz then started asking him why he didn’t know why his son was kicked out of camp, asking if any of his other kids had ever been kicked out of camp and whether it was disturbing to find out his son had been. He said that none of his kids had been kicked out before and that is was disturbing to find that out. Kurtz then asked why he didn’t ask why his kid was kicked out of camp, and he said he probably did, he just doesn’t remember now, but he remembers it being related to fighting with a kid.

Kurtz then asked him about the first CPS meeting with his kid, slipping in a snide remark about the father feeling free to wait a week to take his family on vacation before scheduling it, asking how many times they asked about the abuse. He said 4 or 5. Kurtz asked if his son denied it, and he said that his son had said he didn’t remember anything.

Moving on to the video of the playdate at the therapist’s office, Kurtz asked him if his son was led by the first alleged victim to say anything. That was objected to and sustained. Kurtz then tried to get him to say his son had denied the allegations in that room, and he insisted that he never said that, and that his son had just said he didn’t remember.

Kurtz then asked him essentially if at that point, after talking to CPS, police, and the first alleged victim’s parents, he decided to just make a disclosure happen because his son wasn’t saying anything. That annoyed the father and he said that he wouldn’t say that, the therapist was also trying to figure out why his son’s behavior had changed.

Kurtz asked him if the therapist orchestrated the meeting, and he said that it may have come about because the parents of the first alleged victim suggested it, but that the therapist is the one who made it happen.

Kurtz then started asking him about the involvement of CPS and police in organizing the playdates, showing him emails and asking him if he saw CPS or police people’s email addresses on them. When the father said no, Kurtz asked him if he himself had ever communicated with them about the playdate. He said no, and said that as far as he knew the therapist handled all that for him.

Kurtz then asked him about the CPS hearing to change the findings of CPS about Krawatsky’s alleged abuses. Kurtz, whether mistakenly or on purpose, misrepresented the playdates with the therapist as having happened after the settlement was reached with CPS to downgrade the findings. In actuality the playdates had happened a couple of months before those hearings.

Kurtz asked him if after that hearing and the decision he decided to work with the first alleged victim’s parents to convince his son to make an allegation.

That was immediately objected to and the objection was sustained.

Kurtz then asked him if the first playdate was recorded. The father initially said yes, but then clarified that it hadn’t. He said that the second meeting was recorded. Kurtz then asked him to confirm that there wasn’t a disclosure made at the second meeting, and he said that wasn’t true. Kurtz asked if there was a disclosure on tape why did the mother of the first alleged victim have to talk to his son. At that point there was an objection and it was sustained.

Kurtz then set up the narrative for his next question, saying that the father had initially not wanted to let the first alleged victim’s mother talk to his kid, but eventually allowed it anyway, that the father had his son in his lap when she came in, that she was very intense, getting loud with his kid, and loudly asking him to tell the truth, to say it happened, and things like that.

The father contradicted that narrative (that she had shouted and demanded specific things of his son) and said that she had just asked his son to tell his father what happened and that talking would make him feel better.

Kurtz then asked him if it was true that she said “Isn’t it true that he offered you money to touch his privates?” He said he didn’t remember her saying that (meaning that’s not what he believes she said).

Kurtz then asked him if his son was diagnosed with a seizure disorder in 2015. He said that his son had had a seizure but wasn’t diagnosed with a seizure disorder. Kurtz asked him why his son had been out on powerful seizure meds he’d had a strong allergic reaction to that almost killed him if he didn’t have a seizure disorder. He said it was preventative.

Next the second alleged victim’s mother was called by Ian Richardson. She said she first met K at Shoresh where she first worked as a counselor and then assistant director of Junior Shoresh, and that her relationship with him was just coworkers, not friends per se, but no reason to dislike him.

Her son, she said, the second alleged victim, attended Shoresh from 2014 – 2015, when she worked there. She said that in 2015 he was in the Shoresh lower boys division, which was 6-7 year olds to 10 year olds. That was the summer, she said, that he was expelled from camp because, as she understood it, he was hitting a kid or two. She said she was told about that toward the end of one day by Krawatsky who carried her son over to her, holding him over his shoulder.

She said her son was crying and kicking and not happy when Krawatsky brought him. She said she tried consoling her son, and doesn’t remember her conversation with Krawatsky at that time because she was more concerned with consoling her son.

After camp 2015, she said, she and her husband started noticing behavioral changes in their son. He was bedwetting every day, she said, didn’t want to do things they’d done before, and refused to go into locker rooms.

She said the last time she remembered her son bedwetting was when he was potty trained around 3 years old, and maybe the occasional accident, but it really started again more frequently, eventually stopping a few years later.

She also said that he would occasionally find himself in locker rooms during summer, when they visited a pool, or did sports, and he’d refuse to go in. To this day, she said, he has an issue entering locker rooms.

She said her son eventually disclosed that Krawatsky offered him $100 to touch his penis. She said that the disclosure came during their nighttime routine after he had a bath, got into bed, and they were doing storytime. She said he started talking about camp, and that’s when he disclosed.

She said she made a recording at the time (this is the recording that was played during Krawatsky’s side’s opening statement). This was the first time they were hearing such a disclosure from him, but they had heard about the allegations previously from CPS so it wasn’t a surprise necessarily, but they didn’t know it had happened to him specifically.

She said she recorded it because she wanted to make sure she didn’t miss anything, or for her husband to miss it, and she just wanted to get the truth. She said she wasn’t coaching him, and wasn’t trying to record so she could hand it to CPS or the police, she just wanted to ask him some questions and record it. She had not been trained in forensic interviewing, she said, she was just trying to understand what happened. She said she had no agenda, and wasn’t trying to make him disclose. In fact, she pointed out, at one point he corrected her about something she said.

Moving on to discuss Krawatsky, she said that she had received a video from him of her son at the Shoresh shabbaton. This, she said, was while she was employed at Shoresh, and as she understood it at the time employees weren’t supposed to use their personal phones during camp.

Direct examination ended with her talking about the pool and locker room and explaining that the divisions were sex segregated so the locker room was divided between boys and girls, and when either was swimming the other side would be empty.

Chris Rolle then cross examined her.

He asked her about the nature of her relationship with Krawatsky during her time working at Shoresh, and she said that they were just colleagues not friends. She said she had no concerns about him at the time and assumed he had gone through the screening to be employed there so that he was fit to work there.

He then asked her about the day he carried her son on his shoulder to bring him to her and whether she understood that her child was having difficulties over the summer. She said that it wasn’t the entire summer, just that one time he brought her son to her.

He then asked her if there was an allegation against her son that at camp he’d threatened to touch another kid’s rectum, and she said she didn’t remember that. He asked her about her role as head of the bus stop and she stated her responsibilities – checking every kid got on the bus – after which he asked her if she recalled her son ever having a negative interaction with kids at the bus stop. She said she didn’t remember.

He then asked her about what kind of contact junior Shoresh campers would have had with Krawatsky and she explained that while the lower part of junior Shoresh would have minimal contact, the final year of junior Shoresh was designed to help acclimate the kids to how lower division worked so they spent a lot of time together, thus exposing them to more of Krawatsky.

He asked her about behavioral changes she noticed in her son and when, and she said that she noticed changes starting to happen after summer 2014, and she believes that something happened with Krawatsky that year. She described seeing behavioral issues in his school where she also worked. She emphasized though that she wasn’t made aware of the issues because she was a worker there, but because she was a parent and that it was standard protocol to tell the parents when kids started acting up.

She said she remembered an incident in spring of 2015 where her son caused such a disturbance that the kindergarten had to be emptied.

He then asked her about her son’s seizures and whether he was diagnosed with a seizure disorder shortly after the incident in Kindergarten. She explained that, no, he didn’t have a seizure disorder, rather he’d had one febrile seizure when he was 2 years old, and they had been following with periodic MRIs to see if there were any changes. She said the doctor said there might have been something because he was noticing that her son seemed to be zoning out a little, and as a preventative measure to make sure he didn’t get seizures he gave her son medicine to alleviate it.

She said that this happened in 2015 but that she didn’t remember if it was before or after the playdates at the therapist’s office. Asked about the reaction her son had she said that he had a severe allergic reaction to the medicine, but rather than agreeing that he almost died she said that it was severe and that he was in the hospital for a while.

He then asked her about whether she knew if as a head counselor Krawatsky could ask permission to use his personal phone, and she said she didn’t know. He asked if she didn’t know if he had gotten permission and she said that you’d have to ask him. He asked her if she cared at the time that he was using his phone and she said she didn’t because as a parent she’d asked for updates and that it was pretty common.

Regarding the playdates with the therapist, he asked her if she was involved in setting them up. She said that her husband led on that but that she knew about them. He asked her if she knew that until the playdates her son had denied anything happened, and she said that he had just not disclosed. He asked her to confirm that he hadn’t disclosed several times to CPS, to the therapist, to her, and she said yes.

He asked her if she knew why the mother of the first alleged victim had reached out to her, and she said she didn’t know specifics, but she knew she had texted and wanted to talk about the case and the boys in general. He showed her a document of text records between her and the mother if the first alleged victim and asked again why the mother of the first alleged victim had reached out. She answered that according to what he’d shown her she wanted to talk about her son because their two sons were friends.

She said that the mother of the first alleged victim introduced herself as his mother and said that the social worker (CPS) suggested she reach out and that she was sure the mother of the second victim was as concerned as she was. He asked if she knew what that meant. She answered saying that her husband testified that they didn’t know why CPS was coming to them, and that text with the mother of the first victim happened before CPS contacted them.

He asked her about several further attempts by the mother of the first victim to contact her, mentioning in various texts that she was deeply troubled by what had happened with their sons, or that she heard they were having trouble with the Shoresh rabbis, or that they were the only ones who could understand what she was going through. She said she didn’t respond to any of these texts from the mother of the first alleged victim, but she did agree to have their two sons meet.

She said she didn’t attend the meetings and that her husband did, and that the purpose of the playdates was to get her son to say what had happened. She acknowledged that the mother of the first alleged victim spoke to her son at the second meeting and that before then her son had denied any abuse. He asked her if after the mother of the first alleged victim spoke to her son is when her own son finally disclosed, and she responded to contradict his implication that the disclosure was immediate, instead saying that it was 2 or 3 weeks later.

He then set out a timeline to set up a question: The playdate happened on December 3rd 2015, a while later on the 23rd there was a meeting with her son, the CPS social worker, detective Davies, and that she gave the recording she made of her son’s disclosure to CPS and Davies, and asked her if the reason she gave the recording to them was to get them to come back and do an additional interview with her son. She said she didn’t know.

He asked her if she knew that the second meeting with CPS at the therapist’s office happened, and she said she didn’t know the details, she wasn’t there.

He then set the stage for the jury regarding her son’s disclosure: He gets out of the bathtub doing his nightly routine, and then asks her if her family was at the time living at a hotel because of a severe fire that had required them to evacuate their house. She said that they could have stayed home if they needed to, the structure was still fine, but they decided to go to a hotel. He asked her if they were there during the fire and had to leave the house, and she replied that yes, that’s what people do in a fire, they evacuate the house.

He asks her about the general hullabaloo of it all, that there’s a fire, and fire trucks coming, and they’re evacuating, and it’s a big deal, and she acknowledges that. She says the fire happened Monday before Thanksgiving.

He states that they’re in the hotel in December in two adjoining rooms, and they’re in one of the rooms with their son, and he asks her what he started to say. She said that he started talking about camp – she assumes when she was in bed doing his bedtime routine – and that’s when she reached for her phone. She said she didn’t remember his exact words but when he started talking about camp she started discreetly recording without him noticing so he shouldn’t stop talking.

He starts playing the audio of that recording, the same audio that was played in their opening statement. First snippet he played was about her asking her son if he could tell her the person who hurt her, and if he had hurt anyone else. He asked her why that was her follow up question and she said that she had no training in how to handle a disclosure, she’s just a mom trying to see what happened with her son, and that’s why she asked what she asked throughout the recording.

Next snippet was her asking if her son knew the first alleged victim and he asked if that was her trying to tie that kid in with her own son’s experiences. She said no.

Next snippet is the allegation her son made then that Krawatsky had offered him $100 to touch his penis, and that Krawatsky had hurt him and said mean things. On one detail of it her son corrected her. She then asked if Krawatsky had hurt the first alleged victim as well, and Rolle asked her if she was trying to get her son to corroborate what the first alleged victim had said, and she said no. He challenged her saying that she at that point had known the first alleged victim’s allegations, and she said that this had all been very emotional for her and that her husband had been handling most of it.

Next snippet was regarding her son saying that he had been left alone on his own at some point on the Shoresh Shabbaton. He asked her why she was asking her son about that, and she said that kids shouldn’t be left unattended in camp. He asked if she’d ever heard him say he’d been alone at some point over the shabbaton before this point, and she said no.

Next snippet is her son saying that Krawatsky was rude and mean to other kids and that he knows because people told him. He asked her, referring back to her son being expelled from camp, if by the time this recording was made her son blamed Krawatsky for his expulsion. She said that at the time that was true.

Next snippet was her asking if her son and Krawatsky were ever alone and he said no. Then there were questions played regarding the sleepover at camp. He asked her if she was asking those questions because she thought Krawatsky had abused her son during the sleepover at camp. She said that she was just asking questions with no specific intent to identify a time and place, she just wanted to ask her son about things she knew he had attended. He asked her if the questions had anything to do with theorizing the parents of the first alleged victim may have shared with her, and she said no.

Next snippet was whether Krawatsky was with him at the shabbaton (no) if he saw Krawatsky at all (yes), if Krawatsky scared him, and how many times Krawatsky had asked her son to touch him. He then asked her if she had asked him over and over (implying that she was asking too many times to elicit a specific response). She said no, that they were talking about the shabbaton so she was asking her son if Krawatsky had touched him over the shabbaton.

Next snippet was her asking when the touching happened, and her son responded that it was the middle of the end of camp. She asks her son again about how frequently the touching happened.

Rolle asked her if she was asking so often because she was expecting a different answer, and she said no, that she knows with 7 year olds you have to ask them questions a few times before they answer it.

Next snippet is of her son not wanting to answer any more questions. She asks him a few more questions about what happened, and he says nothing and seems to get a little tired of answering. One of the questions is what her son wants to happen to Krawatsky.

Rolle asked her why she would ask her son such a question and she said because kids are taught at home and in school that actions have consequences.

Next snippet had some more questions about the first alleged victim’s son and if there was anyone else Krawatsky hurt.

Rolle asked why she was mentioning the first alleged victim again. She said it was because their children were close friends and she didn’t know any of the other kids. He asked her if it was because she knew the other kid had a story and she was trying to get another story (to corroborate that one), and she said no.

Cross examination ended, and Ian Richardson asked some redirect questions.

He asked her about the incident when Krawatsky carried her son to her at camp and if anyone else was with him when he was carrying her son to her. She said no. He asked her if the recording was her trying to get the truth, and she said yes. He then asked her if she wanted the truth to be that her kid was abused, and, crying, she responded no.

She was excused and they broke for lunch.

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The Trial of Steven Shmuel Krawatsky: Day One

Yesterday began the civil trial between Shmuel Krawatsky and the families of his alleged victims. Krawatsky was publicly accused in a Jewish Week article in 2018 by 3 families of sexually abusing their children at Camp Shoresh, a day camp near Baltimore. Shortly following the accusation, Krawatsky filed a federal defamation suit against the families which was dismissed for jurisdictional reasons. Krawatsky then filed another defamation case in state court in September of 2018. In response the families filed a countersuit for the sexual abuse allegedly committed by Krawatsky against their children.

The case has dragged on for 6 years, bogged down in endless procedural fighting. A number of parties were dismissed from the case on both sides. The Jewish Week, and journalist, Hannah Dreyfus, who initially covered the allegations for the Jewish Week (now owned by 70 Faces Media), had initially been defendants in the defamation case, but were removed from the case in summary judgment. Camp Shoresh was also removed from the case after a ruling from the judge determined that they didn’t have sufficient notice to have known that Krawatsky was a potential threat.

This set the stage for the trial.

Given how complicated this case was, with claims and counterclaims against multiple parties, the judge broke the trial up into several parts. The first part, which began yesterday, is to determine whether or not the alleged abuse actually happened. Once the jury makes a determination on those claims the remaining claims can be decided.

The central allegations of the case are this: That at various times Shmuel Krawatsky repeatedly either molested, or orally or anally raped these three children in the poolhouse at Camp Shoresh. This part of the trial centers around whether or not those alleged abuses happened. Since this is central to the question of both damages for defamation and damages for abuse, and the burden is on the defense to prove their counterclaim, the defense is presenting its case first.

To simplify, the defense for the purpose of this post means the families accusing Krawatsky. The Plaintiff is Krawatsky.

The Defendants’ attorney offered his opening statement first. He began by laying out the context of case, where the burden of proof lies, and the meaning of the burden of proof – preponderance of the evidence. To illustrate the meaning of that burden he described a perfectly balanced scale, and preponderance meaning even the lightest feather weight tipping it in one direction.

He then reminded the jury about the ages of everyone involved at the time. Given that the abuse is alleged to have taken place in 2014 and 2015, the children would have been around 7 or 8 at the time. He showed pictures of each of the three children at those ages.

He then gave some details about the case, describing how the first alleged victim disclosed in 2015 after mentioning to his parents that he had had a dream in which Krawatsky had pissed on him. After discussion with his parents he eventually told them that Krawatsky would walk around the Shoresh locker room naked and regularly tickled boys. He also alleged that Krawatsky offered him $100 to touch his penis, and that Krawatsky anally raped him. The second alleged victim claims that Krawatsky offered him $100 to touch his penis, but doesn’t remember the rest. The third alleges that Krawatsky repeatedly orally and anally raped him over two summers.

He then laid out how the CPS investigations into these allegations shook out. Before getting into the specifics he laid out the three possible designations that CPS can give to a case after investigating: Indicated, unsubstantiated, and ruled out. Indicated means that CPS believes abuse or neglect happened and feels confident they can prove it. Unsubstantiated means that they believe abuse or neglect may have happened but don’t feel they can prove it. Ruled out means they don’t believe abuse or neglect happened at all.

He described how the first and second alleged victims’ CPS cases resulted in indicated findings, and the third resulted in an unsubstantiated finding. After an appeal by Krawatsky, the indicated findings were changed to unsubstantiated out of a desire to spare the boys from having to relive the trauma by testifying at the appeal.

He then preemptively addressed a potential strategy by the plaintiff, telling the jury that they may hear that the parents coached the kids to say that Krawatsky abused them for a specific reason. He told the jury to asked themselves what the parents stood to gain by doing that, and asserted that they were simply loving parents who stood up for their kids.

He told the jury that he would show them examples of Krawatsky lying during the course of the case, including him lying about having and using a cellphone while at camp (which is important because he is alleged to have taken illicit photos of the children on his phone despite claiming that he never had or used a personal phone at camp), and that he lied about giving the children gifts (which often is a tactic used by an abuser who wants to groom their victims), telling the jury that they would see an actual gift given by Krawatsky to the children as an exhibit in the case.

Next was the plaintiff’s opening.

He began by saying that they aren’t blaming the kids at all, that they were just young, impressionable children being pressured by their parents to invent these allegations against Krawatsky. He laid out an alternative view of the case: The first alleged victim first told his mother that he had a dream about Krawatsky pissing on him, but his mother doesn’t remember how she got from her son disclosing the dream to him alleging that Krawatsky had raped him.

He then reminded the jury that Krawatsky was the one bringing this case against the parents as a defamation suit to clear his name from these accusations. The only thing worse than being a child molester, he said, was being falsely accused of being a child molester. He then told the jury that this was a civil case, and that there was no criminal case because police and the DA had declined to prosecute.

He then told the jury that he suspects a lot of them believed the story when they initially heard it from the defense because why would 3 kids lie? He then laid out 5 reasons why the allegations shouldn’t be believed:

Location: The location of where they claim the abuse took place (which he explained in a later point).

Corroboration: Listen for what’s not there: No DNA, hair, blood, or corroboration of any of these allegations.

Witnesses: There are no witnesses to the event identified by the children except for one nonverbal child who was being shadowed by a paraprofessional.

Believability: The third alleged victim claims he was anally raped every day it didn’t rain (meaning every day there was swimming as an activity) for two summers in the pool locker room while lots of people were around. We will show video of regular day to day operation of this location. The claims this happened repeatedly with no one noticing are not credible. The only way into the pool is through the locker room, back and forth. Kids and counselors are constantly in and out.

He continued by saying that there are no other alleged victims of Krawatsky, and that it’s unlikely for a serial rapist who worked with children for 15 years to not have any other similar allegations.

Timeline: 3 boys at Shoresh, all in the same group, all swimming at the same time with the whole division – it’s unlikely that with that many people around that these rapes could have happened so frequently with no one noticing.

He then moved on to address claims he believed the defense would make about behavioral changes indicating abuse in the alleged victims. He said that 2 of the 3 boys had behavioral issues before the alleged abuse. Alleged victims 2 and 3 were already seeing a psychologist. The behavioral issues these boys had, he said, predated the alleged abuse and weren’t caused by it. He laid out how one of the boys had been expelled from Shoresh at one point, and that another child had never been away from his parents before, having been homeschooled, and was having issues being away from his parents for the first time. He reiterated that these issues were not caused by Krawatsky.

After camp, he continued, the first alleged victim had this dream, and that both of his parents reacted to it, but that neither could remember who first heard the dream from him. He then said that the camp reported to CPS (although it should be noted that in previous filings by the defense, the camp allegedly took longer to report than they should have, initially reaching out to Krawatsky to discuss the allegations and reassure him that they would stand by him), CPS interviewed the kids, and the first alleged victim claimed that the second alleged victim was with him, but the second alleged victim contradicted that account and claimed nothing happened.

He then said that he first alleged victim was interviewed by his therapist and also denied any abuse at the time. He then laid out the plaintiff’s theory of the case: That, desperate to get another kid to corroborate their child’s story, the parents of the first alleged victim colluded with the second alleged victim’s therapist and parents to allow them to speak to the second alleged victim directly at the therapist’s office, but that after two sessions the second alleged victim still denied that any abuse happened. He then said that the first alleged victim’s mother asked to talk directly to the second alleged victim, and that during that conversation she pressured him to say specific things, which, scared of her, he weakly acknowledged.

The plaintiff’s lawyer then played a recording of a conversation between the second alleged victim and his mother. The gist of the recording is that over the course of about 10 minutes of gentle questioning by his mother at the time, the second alleged victim repeatedly offered contradictory accounts of what had happened, at times reaffirming and at times denying the allegations against Krawatsky. At various times he referenced bad things other people had told him Krawatsky had done.

The lawyer then described proper interviewing techniques (not asking leading questions, not asking yes or no questions, or leading questions) and then claimed the kids were coached into their answers.

It should be noted that he never really articulated a firm motive for the three parents to go along with this, or for the first parent to instigate this beyond claiming she had a desire to pin what she believed happened to her son on Krawatsky. The central thrust of their argument is this: She was an attached mother who overreacted to her son’s dream, and therefore did everything she could to get other kids to make the same allegation and pin what she believed happened to her son on Krawatsky. He offered no motives for the other parents.

Next the first witness, the third alleged victyim, was called by the defense’s lead attorney. He is currently 16 year old, and walked up to the stand clutching a somewhat worn out stuffed rhino. Sitting in the back, on the floor, was the second alleged victim holding his service dog.

The defense attorney, Jon Little, opened by asking the third alleged victim about his stuffed animal. He answered by saying he liked rhinos because they’re strong and offer protection. Jon asked him about the second alleged victim, and if he knew him. He replied saying he didn’t. Jon then asked if he knew the parents of the first alleged victim, who are also his aunt and uncle. He replied that he does, but hasn’t talked to them in a long time.

Jon then asked him about Shoresh. He described the regular day to day schedule at Shoresh. Jon then asked him about Krawatsky. He said Krawatsky was in charge of his age group at the time. He then said that he was regularly alone with Krawatsky in the locker room, and that Krawatsky would come up with pretexts to get him alone, telling him he was getting punished for various reasons. These punishments, he said, consisted of Krawatsky putting his penis in the third alleged victim’s anus and mouth, and putting the third alleged victim’ penis in his own mouth. The third alleged victim said he remembered Krawatsky’s penis being hairy and tasking bad.

He then said that he didn’t tell anyone what happened because he was scared of Krawatsky’s threats that he would cut the third alleged victim’s ears off and kill his family. He restated these allegations for summer of 2015 as well, saying he hadn’t seen Krawatsky between the two summers at all. He reiterated his reasons for not reporting, namely his fear of Krawatsky’s threats.

After camp in 2015, he described his aunt, the mother of the first alleged victim, coming over and telling him a story about a child who exploded from keeping too many secrets. He says he didn’t disclose anything immediately, but didn’t feel coerced or pressured by the story, and he never saw her again. He said he never spoke to her about Krawatsky. He said he later disclosed to his mother, claiming that Krawatsky only touched his anus and penis, an allegation he also made to CPS in 2016. However, in 2017, he disclosed that Krawatsky had raped him. He said he made these allegations to his therapist, CPS, and in two depositions before testifying yesterday.

He also testified to an incident that happened in 2016 between him and his cousin, when both were around 7 or 8, that at a sleepover he “hurt” his cousin because he had been threatened by Krawatsky that if he didn’t, Krawatsky would hurt him. He denied that the mother of the first alleged victim ever told him what to say.

Cross examination was conducted by Benjamin Kurtz, whose demeanor was angry and combative toward the third alleged victim. He opened by asking the third alleged victim about his brother who was with him at Shoresh. The third alleged victim said his brother was never with him when the abuse happened, but was at swimming generally when the abuse was taking place in the locker room.

Kurtz asked him if he remembered if his brother ever asked him if anything happened, or if he ever remembers telling his brother that he was in pain after each day’s abuse. To both he responded that he didn’t remember. Kurtz then pivoted to asking him about the incident he described between him and his cousin. The third alleged victim said he didn’t remember what exactly happened but he believes it was sexual, saying again that he only did it because Krawatsky had threatened him.

Kurtz asked him why he thought Krawatsky would know whether he had or hadn’t abused his cousin, and he responded saying that at the time he was scared that Krawatsky had cameras in his house and would know. Kurtz then repeatedly asked him questions about the incident.

Kurtz then asked him about the rape he claimed (in an earlier filing) happened at a water park in Pennsylvania. He said he didn’t remember if anyone else was with him at that rape, and also said he doesn’t remember if he ever gave a different answer to that question in the past when asked. Kurtz at this point just straight up combatively asked him if after repeatedly denying being abused he only remembered the abuse after his aunt told him the story of a child exploding from keeping too many secrets. He said that no, he remembered, but was too scared to disclose to anyone.

Kurtz then asked what about that story made him not scared to disclose, and he responded saying that the story made him finally not keep it a secret.

In a moment that shocked the entire courtroom, Kurtz then angrily and sarcastically said essentially, so when you thought that it was your family that would be killed you stayed quiet, but only once you thought you would explode you decided you needed to speak up, very strongly implying that the third alleged victim was a selfish person in his motivations for disclosing. It was a shocking moment because what they were discussing was what took place when the third alleged victim was 8 years old.

In my opinion what he was trying to do was make the jury think of the 16 year old, full sized teenager in front of them as an abuser himself who had attacked his cousin, and then selfishly pinned it on Krawatsky to deflect. I don’t think it landed the way he intended. To everyone in the courtroom it seemed like he had just attacked a victim of child sexual abuse for what he had done and said when he was 8.

Following a break, the third alleged victim’s mother was called to the stand. Annie Alonso handled her direct examination.

She started by asking the mom about her impressions of Shoresh. She said she sent her kids to Shoresh because she attended an open house and it seemed like a good place, and because they had friends who were also going. When asked about her other son’s experience at Shoresh, she said he had a great time. Her other son, however, she said, struggled, frequently coming home in his bathing suit, even though they were supposed to change after swimming, saying he didn’t go swimming to avoid getting in trouble. She said he struggled to fit in and that he’d get in trouble.

She said she didn’t know Krawatsky before her sons went to Shoresh, and that she first communicated with him at an open house held right before camp started for parents to meet staff. She said she spoke to Krawatsky shortly after camp started after he called her to let her know that her son had almost drowned a kid. She said she was devastated, but that Krawatsky assured her that the child was fine, and that he’d taken her son aside and handled what had been done wrong. She said she was relieved her son was avoiding an expulsion thanks to Krawatsky and that the other kid was ok. She said she didn’t know what she’d do with her son if he was expelled as she worked full time.

She said she spoke to Krawatsky again on the phone. She said he called her after her son got frustrated at a soccer game after the game ended before he got a chance to be goalie. He told her he was teaching her son calming techniques, involving Krawatsky and her son squeezing each other’s hands, and him squeezing his own hands to calm down. She said she was happy at the time that Krawatsky was taking a special interest in helping her son with his struggles.

She said she spoke to Krawatsky again before a camp overnight to ask for permission to pick her son up late that night rather than having him stay overnight as he wasn’t ready to stay overnight at camp. She said Krawatsky said her son was a great kid and that he welcomed him back the next year.

She said that prior to Shoresh her son had behaviour issues, namely anxiety, and easily getting angry and frustrated, but that she did notice a behavioral change after Shoresh. In particular she said that he started smearing poop on the walls in the bathroom, screaming about monsters living in the bathroom, and needing her to sit outside the bathroom while he was inside it. She said his anxiety became more raw and fearful.

Alonso then asked her about the stuffed rhino. She answered that he had gotten into rhinos because they’re big and strong and have a horn to protect them. His first rhino, she said, he got in 2014 or 2015, and he got the one he was holding in court a few years later. She explained that it was kind of like his security blanket that he takes with him to highly anxious situations like court or depositions.

She then moved on to talking about her family, saying she is close to one of her brothers, but that she isn’t really in touch with her brother and sister in law, first alleged victim’s parents. She said that her sister in law had only spoken to her son once to tell him the story about the boy who exploded due to keeping secrets and that she seemed normal during that conversation. She said that her son didn’t immediately react to hearing the story. She said that she knew about the CPS investigation into the first alleged victim’s claims, but didn’t discuss them with her sister in law.

When asked if she knew the parents of the second alleged victim she said that she only met the father once in 2017, and only knew the mother from Shoresh and that they never hung out socially. She said she never met or spoke to the second alleged victim.

Asked about her son’s CPS investigation she said that when he initialy disclosed she just thanked him and told him she loved him and that she wanted to talk to his therapist about it. She said he was already in therapy at that point. She said CPS got involved in 2016 and that she spoke to them, and to police about it, and that she remembered that the result of the CPS investigation was unsubstantiated.

She said she continued her son in therapy and added another therapist to his treatment plan for some more specialized therapy. He recalled the 2017 investigation too, where her son disclosed the rape, that the investigators were the ones she spoke to, and that the result of that investigation was indicated. She recalled that the finding was appealed, and that she received a subpoena to testify at the hearing, but was anxious about it and didn’t want her son to have to see his rapist again. She said that the result of the appeal was that the finding was changed to unsubstantiated, but that the change in finding changed nothing about how she acted toward her son.

On cross examination she was asked if the day her son disclosed to her was the same day her sister in law told her son the story about secrets, and she answered yes.

Next the CPS worker, Brenda Lohman, was called.

She said that she worked for CPS since 2014 and described her duties working for them. She also described the training she got in interviewing techniques.

She said that she remembered investigating the third alleged victim’s claims in 2016 after being assigned the case, and that the first part of the investigation involved reaching out to the family to have the child come in for an interview. She said she didn’t record the interview because the county didn’t allow that at the time. She said she referred the child to the Child Advocacy Center for medical evaluation.

She then said she remembered interviewing Krawatsky and that he claimed he was never alone with the child. She said she next spoke to the father of another child who was identified as being able to corroborate the third alleged victim’s account and that after finishing her report her disposition on the case was unsubstantiated.

She said that in 2017 she was involved in the second investigation following the alleged victim’s disclosure of rape. She said the interview with the child was conducted by another CPS worker but that she watched it live on CCTV. She said she met with the third alleged victim’s parents and spoke to Krawatsky again.

She said she asked him about having a personal cellphone at camp and that he denied having one at camp. She said she didn’t have the power to subpoena cell records. She said that she initially found the case to be indicated but on appeal that finding was changed to unsubstantiated.

On cross examination she was asked by Krawatsky’s lawyer, Chris Rolle, about the particulars of an unsubstantiated ruling. She was asked if someone with an indicated finding could work as a teacher or counselor. She answered that if it was a teacher the info would be forwarded to the school and the teacher would most likely be fired, but that there was no specific protocol for camp counselors. Asked the same question about an unsubstantiated finding she said that they could work with kids in a school but it would be up to the employer. She wasn’t able to answer if an unsubstantiated finding would appear on a background check, but said they stay on CPS internal records for 5 years.

Regarding the phone records, when asked, she said she doesn’t have the power to subpoena phone records, but that police do. As far as she knew, however, no such records had been subpoenaed by the detective on the case

On redirect Alonso asked her whether the detective was with her when she interviewed Krawatsky and she said he was not.

Next the defense called the third alleged victim’s brother. Alonso handled this direct examination.

He described the day to day at Shoresh, and said he was 7 in 2014 when he attended. He was in the same age group as his brothers, an only boys group. He said he saw Krawatsky with his brother one day when they were going to play gaga coming up the hill with the nonverbal kid, and thought nothing about it at the time.

He said he never saw his brother alone with Krawatsky but on multiple occasions he noticed that his brother was just missing from the group, during color war, and scheduled activities.

He said his brother had talked to him about the sexual abuse he had experienced at some point. He said he talked to CPS in this case, doesn’t remember which worker, and that he was in 4th grade at the time. He said he didn’t know the parents of the second alleged victim, but that he did know the mother of the first alleged victim, but hadn’t talked to her in years. He said that no one, including his aunt and uncle, his brother, or his mom, had pressured him to speak in this case. He said his mom had just asked him to come tell the truth in court in response to a subpoena by Krawatsky’s lawyers.

On cross examination Kurtz asked him to elaborate on what he meant when he said his brother was missing. He said that his brother would be missing from archery, arts and crafts, lessons, etc, and that he never said his brother was never missing from the pool area during swimming.

This was the last witness of the day. The jury was dismissed, and after a few small procedural matters court was adjourned for the day.

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Boro Park Doctor, Robert Goodman, Accused of Sexual Assault by Two Former Patients

Dr Robert Goodman is an internal medicine doctor in Boro park at 1523 45th St, Brooklyn, NY 11219. He also has admitting privileges at Maimonides Hospital. He has been operating as a doctor in the community for decades.

**Plaintiff 1**

Plaintiff 1 moved to Boro Park in 2000 with her 4 kids following her divorce. In 2005, at the age of 34, she was suffering from a sore throat and cold symptoms, and needed to see a doctor. Plaintiff 1’s friend recommended Doctor Goodman, and accompanied her to her first appointment with him. According to the complaint, Plaintiff 1 reports that this initial appointment was entirely straightforward.

According to the complaint, when Plaintiff 1 returned for a follow up appointment alone, Goodman entered the examination room and locked the door behind him. He then allegedly began rubbing her arm while talking to her, then moving his hand to her upper arm, then over her breasts, which he then began to grope. Plaintiff 1 states that she was shocked, and got up, left the room, and never returned.

Plaintiff 1 states that she went back to her job at another doctor – one who regularly referred to Goodman – in a daze, and told some of her coworkers what had happened to her there. Plaintiff 1 states in the complaint that her coworkers were hardly surprised, telling her that everyone knows Goodman gropes women.

Later that day, Plaintiff 1 alleges that she told another trusted person what happened. That person told her that Dr. Goodman had groped her breasts as well, and had once asked her if she worked out frequently because she had “really nice breasts.”

Unable to sit idly by while Goodman allegedly groped his way through all of his patients, Plaintiff 1 alleges that she reported him to Maimonides Hospital, where he had (and still has) admitting privileges. According to the complaint, she was told by Maimonides’ administration that Goodman wasn’t an employee, and she was left with the distinct impression that they wouldn’t do anything about these allegations.

The complaint further alleges that while Maimonides may have claimed Goodman wasn’t an employee, they listed him on his website and allowed patients to schedule time with him through their website. The complaint also alleges that Maimonides had a duty to report any allegations of abuse they received about him to the medical board, and failed to do so.

In June of 2018, fed up with the community’s inaction on this apparent open secret about Dr Goodman, Plaintiff 1 posted an account of her abuse by Goodman on Facebook. Plaintiff 1 states that in response dozens of women contacted her with their experiences of being abused and harassed by Goodman, with a handful more leaving comments with their experiences in response to her post. According to the complaint, following this post, the friend who recommended Goodman to Plaintiff 1 told her that she had accompanied her to the first appointment because she had known Goodman’s reputation, and came along to deter him from abusing Plaintiff 1.

Following this public disclosure, her then state assembly member, Dov Hikind, contacted her and asked if she would attend a press conference with him about this issue. Plaintiff 1 alleges that when the two of them spoke, he told her that he had heard such allegations about Goodman over the years, and that he had even heard details from a former physician’s assistant who had worked for goodman, including that this PA had once found a pair of women’s underwear on the floor of Goodman’s office.

Around that same time, according to the complaint, Hikind posted on twitter that a “Well-known doctor in our community [is] being investigated for sexual abuse. Thanks to many women who are cooperating… Sadly, one changed her mind after checking with [a] local rabbi….”

According to the complaint, nothing came of Hikind’s “investigation”. It changed nothing, and in fact, Plaintiff 1 states that it lulled her into a false sense of security that someome was finally going to do something. At the time the Brooklyn DA had been investigating another complaint against Goodman as a result of Plaintiff 1’s post, and none of this information seems to have been taken into consideration. The PA was never produced by Hikind to give testimony in that investigation.

**Plaintiff 2*

Plaintiff 2 grew up in Boro Park. When she was 21 years old, she scheduled an appointment with Goodman for a check up with the goal of potentially switching to his care from her pediatrician. According to the complaint, her first appointment, a standard wellness check, passed without incident. Her next appointment, however, according to the complaint, was for a sore throat.

The complaint alleges that when Goodman saw she was nervous, he sat down next to her and reassured her that she was safe, and had nothing to worry about. He then allegedly leaned in close to her breathing heavily, placed the stethoscope on her chest, and told her she was beautiful, which made Plaintiff 2 very uncomfortable.

According to the complaint, goodman then raised his hands to her chest and started groping her breasts for one minute before stepping back, all the while Plaintiff 2 states that she felt paralyzed, that she was baffled and frightened, and didn’t know what to do.

Plaintiff 2 alleges that he didn’t examine her throat at all. She states that she left his office and never returned, and told a friend of hers everything that had happened.

Over the years, in responses to social media posts, in reviews on his Google page, and various medical directories, people have posted their experiences with Goodman. The complaint cites a few:

One woman wrote that Dr. Goodman made an inappropriate sexual comment to her.

Another woman wrote that her divorced friend visited Dr. Goodman and he hit on her, made inappropriate comments, and continued to call her for days after the appointment.

One woman commented that when she visited Dr. Goodman because she believed she had broken a rib, upon lifting up her shirt, he commented “wow… you’re so cute! And then made other disgustingly inappropriate comments.” She wrote, “I went running so fast out of that office….”

Another woman wrote that Dr. Goodman’s abuse is an “open secret.”

Another woman wrote, “I personally know someone who went to him and concurs with [Plaintiff 1’s] accusation.”

Another woman wrote: “interesting to hear, thought I was the only one. He started sending me really weird very sexually suggestive messages on fb out of the blue….He definitely has the characteristics of a predator and women should be warned.”

Approximately one month ago, a person left a Google review for Dr. Goodman stating: “Women be aware that dr goodman may touch you in inappropriate places while examining you. React quickly. Call him out on it. Push his hand away. Run.”

On December 12, 2018, a former patient commented on vitals.com that Dr. Goodman is a “Serial groper” and an “Unprofessional, unethical, creep.”

On December 23, 2018, a former patient commented on vitals.com that Dr. Goodman is “Seriously perverted” and that their “Personal experience was traumatic.”

This lawsuit has been filed as a class action. If you or someone you know has been sexually assaulted by Dr Robert Goodman, please either reach out to ZAAKAH at 888-492-2524, or info@zaakah.org to be connected with the attorneys in this case.

The Adult Survivors Act window closes on November 23rd. However, if this class action is certified by the court, people who were harmed by Goodman will be able to join the case even after the window closes. To avoid having to worry about whether or not the case is certified, please contact us as soon as possible if you would like to pursue justice against Dr. Robert Goodman.

Link to full complaint:
https://iapps.courts.state.ny.us/nyscef/ViewDocument?docIndex=URy5q3vf/Fvylz0UFkDCwg==

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The Right’s Grooming Panic

As those of you who follow me regularly may have realized, I tend to think and post in long-form. I think in paragraphs. It takes me a while to fully flesh out and explain an idea. Practically speaking that boils down to me really hating Twitter as a platform for discussion and debate, which is why I spend most of my time here on Facebook. For some issues, however, I feel it’s important to engage on Twitter, either because the information I’m posting is informing the public about something I feel is important and relevant, or because there’s a concerted disinformation campaign against the information I’m posting and I feel it’s important to fight back against that.

For example, I spent a fair amount of time on Twitter over the last month posting about the Krishevsky case and combatting the disinformation campaign lying about it claiming it was immediately dismissed (it wasn’t) making ridiculous, mutually exclusive defenses for him, and then recently with the disposition of his case with a low-level plea, the claim that the case was dismissed with a trespassing ticket (he plead guilty to disorderly conduct). I did this because it’s important that the community have access to accurate information about these cases and not have to rely on disinformation.

I’ve also spent a lot of time on Twitter this week arguing about the trans teacher who was fired from Magen David for being trans because there wasn’t a lot of awareness about the case, and because there was so much hate being spewed against her I felt it was important to show some support. As you can imagine it didn’t go very well, but there were a few things that happened over the course of these arguments that I wanted to unpack here.

The first being the repeated accusation that I hate the frum community, everyone in it, and want to destroy it. Why? Because the frum community doesn’t like trans people and I want them to have to hire them as teachers anyway. Tied in with this accusation is the fact that I post incessantly about sexual abuse in the community, and had an opinion about secular education in yeshivas that they found objectionable. It culminated in someone saying to me that I was to the Chassidish community what the Nazis were to the Jews, and what the KKK is to black people.

This happens to me a lot and it speaks to a fundamental difference of opinion between me and others about what comprises the frum community. To them the community is only the people who fit in perfectly, follow the rules not necessarily as they’re set forth in Halacha but as they’re set forth by the rabbonim. Anyone not perfectly in line with the rabbonim, regardless of how personally religious they are, is to them not a part of the community.

I fundamentally disagree. The community is for the most part not something opted into, its something born into, and given the fact that membership for most begins involuntarily there’s necessarily going to be, as with any population, a wide variety of people and experiences within it. There will necessarily be victims of sexual and physical abuse, there will necessarily be gay and trans people, there will necessarily be people with mental illness, and there will necessarily be people who despite following halacha and enjoying the culture will have differences of opinion on the exact application of that halacha and its cultural implications. There will also necessarily be people who no longer want to be a part of either the faith or the community or both.

The community to me is comprised not only of the people who perfectly fit in but also the people who don’t, which is what motivates a lot of my advocacy. Survivors of abuse are also members of the community even if the community generally wishes that weren’t true, or rather, wishes they didn’t have to contend with that fact. The community is also comprised of frum LGBTQ people who are as religious as everyone else they sit next to in shul, and as much a part of the culture and community as everyone else but happen to also be LGBTQ. It’s also comprised of those in the Chassidish communities who wish their children to receive a basic secular education.

I fundamentally don’t believe that the community gets to disclaim responsibility for those members and pretend they aren’t a part.

Others both inside and outside the community often disagree saying things like “well if you don’t like the way things are, leave. This is the way things are and this is the way they’re staying, and you can either get on board and conform or you can get out.” But it’s not that simple. Aside from the difficulty of leaving the community one was born into, it’s also entirely unreasonable.

A Chassidish or Yeshivish kid who’s spent their whole life in the community, went to yeshiva in the community, whose family and friends and entire experience is in the community, whose whole outlook on life, religion, and community is informed by being a part of the community, doesn’t suddenly give that all up because they realized they’re LGBTQ.  Their experiences and cultural and religious identity and beliefs don’t suddenly radically change.

To me this is the same as people who in response to Agunos engaging in activism within the community to free themselves and others and change the way Gittin work in the community tell them they should instead just stop being Orthodox, leave the community, and remarry whoever they like whether the Beis Din approves or not. It’s an entirely unreasonable suggestion that someone whose whole life was within a certain set of beliefs and cultural experiences immediately stop believing and relating to them because of one experience.

It also presupposes that the community has always been one thing since the beginning of time and will be the same thing to the end of time, immutable, and never changing. That’s not true. It’s never been true. The Charedi community as it exists today isn’t the same as it was 100 years ago, even 50 years ago. It isn’t even the same as it was 20 years ago. It’s constantly changing, in some ways becoming more stringent and, in some ways, becoming more open. No community is every stagnant and unchanging. That’s not how human beings work. Things are constantly changing in every community.

It also presumes to claim that the community as a whole is perfectly observant of halacha and that anyone who isn’t falls outside its parameters. That’s not true either and never has been. Out of any given shul there are probably at least 10 adulterers, a wife-beater or two, someone who doesn’t strictly keep kosher, a couple of mechallelei Shabbos, and a few people who have committed fraud and either went away for it or just haven’t been caught yet. No one could argue with a straight face that those people aren’t members of the community. They may not be the community’s shining examples, but for better or worse they’re members.

When I bring this up the counterargument is usually something like, “Well yes, of course they exist, but they at least agree that what they’re doing is wrong. LGBTQ people don’t. Their whole identity is contrary to halacha.” The implication there is that the community as a whole, even when they don’t practice halacha perfectly, have at least bought in to it. In other words, when they’re sinning they know they’re sinning, they acknowledge it, and they give deference to what’s right even if they cant do what’s right.

But that’s not true either. It’s not just individuals who pick and choose, it’s also communities. In my community in Boro Park growing up, it was perfectly normal to commit fraud, cover up sexual abuse, and treat victims of abuse like garbage, none of which is in accordance with halacha. And yet that’s the way it was, and many if not most of the people within the community would agree that those things weren’t big deals. Flagrant violations of halacha that the community as a whole not only engaged it but believed was right. Communities absolutely pick and choose in the same way individuals do, and they tend to be just as dishonest with themselves as individuals are with themselves about their picking and choosing.

Which brings me back to my point.

Whether LGBTQ people observe halacha is between them and Hashem and it’s not really our place to interrogate that any more than we interrogate the halachic observance of anyone else in the community who isn’t LGBTQ, and if you’re going to claim that your community is perfectly Halachically observant, or at least declares as its values the perfect observance of Halacha, you better damn well make sure that’s true before you try to ostracize members of the community on that basis.  

The other thing that happened yesterday was that someone called me a sexual predator because I believed that trans people shouldn’t be fired from frum schools for being trans. Specifically what was said was “Yet you can’t seem to get adults to support your gay/trans/progressive agenda so you favor targeting their children. That makes you the predator. There is zero difference between a rabbi asking a minor for sex and you pushing minors to be indoctrinated about sex.”

Before addressing the bigger problem with that statement, I want to address the very obvious problem with it. The idea that being taught by a trans teacher is a trauma equivalent to being sexually abused as a child is not only monstrous but laughable. The person who said that has clearly never been sexually abused as a child nor talked to anyone who was because if he did he wouldn’t make such comparisons. For starters, there isn’t a documented increase in the suicide rate among students of trans teachers. There isn’t a documented increase in the rates of PTSD, depression, anxiety, addiction, self-harm, and eating disorders among students of trans teachers. There is among victims of sexual abuse.

Being taught social studies by a trans teacher is not traumatic. It might be uncomfortable for some who were raised a home where trans people are vilified, but it’s not traumatic, certainly not on the level of being sexually abused. The idea that the two experiences are even within the same universe as each other, let alone equivalent is insane.

Next there’s the claim that being taught by trans teachers is somehow indoctrinating children about sex. This is a particularly nasty bit of bullshit that has been going around Republican and right wing circles recently. The basic idea being that anyone who supports LGBTQ people being around children is essentially supporting the grooming of children for sexual abuse. There’s a lot to unpack about this claim and most of the time when people encounter it, they choose to just shake their head at it and walk away from it because it’s patently ridiculous but time consuming to argue against in the same way that Holocaust denial is patently ridiculous but time consuming to argue against.

This starts off with the idea that since the “LGBTQ movement’s” whole purpose is essentially to normalize identities that are considered deviant by conservatives, they must exist to normalize *all* identities that are considered deviant by conservatives. This, to them, includes pedophilia. This is not a new accusation, it’s something that gets hurled at LGBTQ people all the time despite it having no basis in reality.  

However, that’s why you may see uproar every now and again about the “left” trying to normalize pedophilia. These days the primary arguments stem from discussions in books like A Long Dark Shadow: Minor Attracted People and Their Pursuit of Dignity, and similar academic papers on the subject of so-called non-offending pedophiles. The argument essentially is that there are people whose sexual orientation is that they’re sexually attracted to children who spend their lives fighting that attraction and they deserve not to be lumped in with the people who actually abuse kids.

This is not a widely accepted idea at all, is extremely controversial, and by and large exists only in a very limited number of academic discussions on the subject. The term itself, Minor Attracted Person, is used in academic studies on the subject, but use of the term is generally a term of precision rather than a value statement on the phenomenon. Studies referencing Minor Attracted Persons are not by definition in favor of destigmatization or normalization. They’re simply using a neutral term for the purpose of being precise.

Despite that, the Right likes pretending that the idea of normalization and acceptance of pedophilia is becoming more popular in society. To cite one example from January 2014, Rabbi Yair Hoffman wrote an article for the Five Towns Jewish Times (republished by Yeshiva World News) titled We Are Under Attack by the LGBTPed Community. Ped being pedophile. The article itself made no mention of pedophilia, nor attempted to explain a connection between LGBTQ people and pedophiles. It was mainly complaining about the banning of conversion therapy in New Jersey and the introduction of a bill in New York to legalize gay marriage.

The Right’s position on this is essentially a slippery slope argument. If you can normalize relationships between same-sex couples, and you can normalize gender identities that are incompatible with society’s accepted gender norms, why couldn’t you normalize pedophilia too? That, therefore, must be the real agenda!

The next part of this argument essentially hinges around the idea that LGBTQ identities are fundamentally sexual. To them the idea that gay people want the people around them to know that they’re attracted to the same sex means that the identity is entirely focused on gay sex. They don’t believe the same thing about being straight, though.

To them straightness is the default and gayness is the deviance, so when straight people appear in popular culture talking about things like dating, falling in love, getting married, having children and building families, they don’t read sex into any of that. When they see a straight couple holding hands they consider that wholesome and don’t register that as sexual. When they see a gay couple doing the same thing their minds immediately jump to sex. To the Right being gay is only about the sex that same-sex couples are having. They don’t acknowledge the relationships around same-sex couples. They don’t see the same desire for love, companionship, stability, and family. All they see is a desire to engage in gay sex.

They feel this way because the foundation of their disgust toward gay people is based on the passuk in Vayikra about homosexual anal sex. To them being gay starts and ends there because that’s why they don’t approve of it. To them the entire identity revolves around that act. This also extends, therefore, to trans and queer people. Basically, anyone with a gender identity or sexual orientation that deviates from what they consider acceptable gets boiled down to being entirely about sex.

Given that position they take the next leap to calling anyone who advocates for LGBTQ people being around children groomers, as in grooming children for sexual abuse. The way they reach that conclusion is by twisting the definition of grooming.

Grooming is a process by which an abuser slowly pushes the boundaries of their relationship with a child, slowly acclimating them to these things that are not appropriate until the boundaries between what is and isn’t appropriate between that adult and that child are so blurred that the child either doesn’t realize that what’s happening is abuse, or feels so responsible for the connection between them and the adult that they will be less likely to report what’s happening.

Grooming often starts by an adult showing a child special attention, and showering them with praise, and gifts. It then often moves on to trying to separate the child from the influence of the adults around them, their parents, other teachers, siblings, relatives, etc, in an attempt to draw them into a world where their only friend, the only one who cares about them, is this adult. It then often progresses to pushing sexual boundaries, often by making inappropriate jokes, talking about sex, showing the child pornography, etc. From there it progresses to touching, which then escalates to sexual abuse. By the time the grooming process has taken its course the child is too confused about what’s happening to tell the other adults around them.

Abusers who are grooming children will also often threaten them in various ways. Sometimes they’ll tell the children that their parents will be mad at them and punish them if they find out what happened. Sometimes they’ll tell the child that if anyone finds out about what happened the adult will lose his job, family, or that the adult will be physically harmed. The child at this point feels a confused allegiance with the adult and may not want that to happen. Sometimes the adult will outright threaten the child that they’ll harm or kill the child if word of what happened gets out, or that they’ll make sure the child will be punished, and that being the adult they’ll be believed over the child anyway.

Victims of grooming and subsequently abuse are often in some way disadvantaged and otherwise vulnerable. Predators will often choose victims who suffer from some kind of mental health or developmental issue, come from a divorced home or a poor or otherwise troubled family, or, ironically, LGBTQ children because their credibility is often lower in more conservative settings, and because their identity can be leveraged against them to prevent them from reporting the abuse.

In this light we can understand the perverse distortion of grooming that the Right relies on when it calls those who support LGBTQ rights groomers.

Because the identities of LGBTQ people are to them entirely about sex, and because the inappropriate acclimation of young children to sex is a part of the grooming process, therefore having LGBTQ people around children is an inappropriate acclimation of those children to sex, which makes them and the people who support them groomers.

It a stretch longer than a taffy pull.

LGBTQ identities are not inherently sexual even though being gay, for example, means that you’re likely to have sex with people of the same sex in the same way that being straight isn’t inherently sexual even though it means that you’re likely to have sex with people of the opposite sex. The endgame of existing as an LGBTQ person is not to abuse children, it’s to live life in the same way everyone else lives life, in pursuit of love, companionship, truth to oneself, and stability. To blanketly claim otherwise is absurd, and yet the Right just hurls this accusation at people as if the words mean nothing, as if they aren’t invalidating the experiences of every child who has ever actually been sexually abused and lived through that trauma.

It’s just disgusting.

When I called him out on that by saying that the overwhelming majority of actual abusers and groomers ZA’AKAH has dealt with have not been any kind of LGBTQ, he responded by saying what the Right always says when they want to disclaim any responsibility for actually caring about child protection and justice for survivors, “I believe all abusers should be castrated in the public square.”

I get this all the time from people, including from people who are in the process of telling my why someone I know for a fact abused kids didn’t abuse them. “Listen,” they say, “I support the work you do. Believe me, if this guy did it I’ll be the first person to castrate him.” It’s a meaningless statement because that’s not actually what happens to abusers. What tends to happen to them, especially in our communities, is that they’re protected by rules forbidding reporting, by people shouting down anyone talking about their cases by accusing them of Lashon Hara, and by claiming that they’re making I up for a host of different reasons.

More broadly speaking when the Right says things like that I point at states like New York, and Pennsylvania, where the Republican state legislatures for over a decade prevented any kind of statute of limitations reform for child sexual abuse from passing to protect religious institutions. Thankfully that changed in New York, but in Pennsylvania the fight is still ongoing. I point to the defunding of the Violence Against Women Act during the Trump administration. VAWA didn’t just fund domestic violence programs, it also funded many state and local programs and nonprofits that directly supported survivors through the reporting and healing processes. Those are just two examples of many where the Right belies its own claims of caring about the safety of children.

During the defunding of VAWA and in states where they fought statute of limitations reform I didn’t see those policies and programs replaced by a regime of mass castration in the public square.

There are concrete ways to help protect children from sexual abuse and secure justice for survivors, but attacking LGBTQ people and taking away their rights isn’t one of them, and doing so not distracts from the very real issues and policies on the table about child protection, but also makes LGBTQ kids more vulnerable to sexual abuse by the real abusers that actually exist in our communities.

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Yeshiva University Sued for Alleged Rape Coverup & Title IX Violation

In a suit filed today in federal court, the author of the Commentator article who alleged that she was raped by a YU student athlete is alleging that YU in its handling of her complaint attempted to cover up her rape, and violated Title IX while doing so.

Plaintiff alleged at the time and reiterates the allegation in her new filing that she went on a date with the alleged rapist (referred to in the lawsuit as Perry Doe) and made it very clear to him that she didn’t want any kind of physical or sexual contact. Perry Doe allegedly nonetheless tried to convince to come back home with her. When she refused, Plaintiff alleges that Perry asked her to help him carry up some things he’d bought as a pretext to get her into his apartment despite her prior refusal.

Plaintiff alleges that once she was in the apartment Perry violently raped her, choking her and forcing her legs open with his knee, both of which allegedly left significant bruising. The complaint alleges that following the rape Plaintiff went back to her apartment, and told her roommates what had happened. They cared for her and convinced her to go to the hospital and have a rape kit done, which she agreed to do.

According to the complaint, following the rape Plaintiff’s schoolwork suffered. She allegedly contacted Dr. Sara Asher, Assistant dean of student affairs, and disclosed the rape to her, asking for accommodation in its aftermath. Dr Asher allegedly told Plaintiff to contact her professors individually and inform them of what had happened to her and request accommodation from them directly.

The complaint alleges that later that month Plaintiff disclosed the name of the assailant to Dr Asher who advised Plaintiff to file a formal Title IX complaint with the school’s Title IX office, headed by Dean of students Dr. Chaim Nissel. According to the complaint, once receiving the complaint Nissel, who had allegedly provided Plaintiff with no resources, no advocate, no real understanding of what the process would look like, and had allegedly told Plaintiff that the results of the investigation they conducted couldn’t be released until Plaintiff signed a nondisclosure agreement, had no contact with Plaintiff during the investigation. According to the complaint that nondisclosure agreement is illegal and therefore void because according to the Clery Act requires that a university is required to give each participant in a Title IX proceeding unfettered access to investigative materials and reports. Plaintiff seeks a declaratory judgment rendering the NDA null and void.

The complaint alleges that rather than give Plaintiff access unfettered access to the investigative reports and materials, YU provided her with an encrypted file that was locked by YU a few days later before she had a chance to review any of the documents with her attorney.

According to the complaint, Nissel did talk to YU’s general counsel, Avi Lauer, and allegedly conspired with him to address, resolve, and whitewash the alleged rape, especially since YU had at the time had begun a massive fundraising campaign that could have been damaged by these allegations. The complaint alleges that a short time later Nissel contacted Plaintiff to let her know that they had contracted what he characterized as an independent investigator to conduct the investigation into her rape. According to the complaint Nissel contracted the lawfirm of Seyfarth Shaw which assigned lawyers Dov Kesselman and Emily Miller to the case.

What was allegedly not disclosed to Plaintiff, however, was the fact that the firm in general and those lawyers in particular had already represented YU for a long time, and in numerous sexual assault cases, too, including the lawsuit filed by the victims of child sexual abuse suing YU for alleged coverup of sexual abuse committed by George Finkelstein and others in the Yeshiva University high school. Plaintiff alleges that this constitutes a clear conflict of interest, especially since these attorneys say on a council called the General Counsel’s Council which comprises attorneys from outside law firms and corporate legal departments who believe in the mission of the university and would like to assist through the provisions of pro bono legal services. Such lawyers, the complaint alleges, would be incapable of conducting an independent, unbiased investigation given not only their direct connection to the school as its longtime lawyers, but also given their personal dedication to the school. According to the complaint this conflict of interests was never disclosed to Plaintiff despite it having potentially been grounds for appeal of YUs decision in this case.

The complaint further alleges that these coverups are part of a pattern of behavior by YU to fraudulently project an image of safety and security for students on its campus contrary to reality. According to the complaint YU has failed to fulfill its Clery Act mandated disclosures of rapes and sexual assaults for over 20 years. The complaint demonstrates that between 2001 and 2020, YU, despite being required to do so by the federal government as a condition of receiving federal funding, disclosed not a single rape or sexual assault during that period despite having received many complaints of the same during that period. The complaint seems to paint a picture of a school more interested in its image than the safety of its students.

According to the complaint, Nissel failed to treat the complaint by Plaintiff as a Title IX case, and without notifying Plaintiff of this, conducted the investigation as though this were a simple disciplinary matter, not a sexual assault, and not a Title IX case. Even within the guidelines set by YU, the complaint alleges that the investigation was inadequate. The complaint alleges that there was no live, in-person interview of Plaintiff and Perry to ascertain credibility, material witnesses who could have corroborated Plaintiff’s claims were not interviewed, and evidence collected by the rape kit was not only never seen by the investigation, it was never sought, despite Nissel and the investigators allegedly knowing clearly about their existence. The complaint alleges that while Nissel and the investigators knew that in order to procure the rape kit from the hospital they would have to get Plaintiff’s permission to release it, they never informed her of that fact and then used that as an excuse for why they hadn’t procured and examined the rape kit.

Included in this testimony and evidence, according to Plaintiff, would be testimony by friends who were told about the rape or saw and cared for her in its aftermath, and pictures of the bruising around her neck and thighs from where Defendant allegedly choked her and forced her legs apart with his knee.

The complaint also alleges that when the investigators interviewed Plaintiff they repeatedly made her tell her story about what had happened, subjecting her to traumatic questioning repeatedly, which not subjecting Perry to a similar level of scrutiny, and not requiring him to restate his version of events repeatedly.

The complaint makes sure to detail why YU should be responsible for this case despite it happening on campus. First, the complaint alleges, the apartment in which the rape took place falls within YU’s security coverage area. Second, given the fact that Perry is a foreign citizen and apartments in the area won’t rent to foreign citizens unless they are vouched for by the school, the school had a hand in securing the apartment. Similarly, since Perry was allegedly under the age of 21 at the time, YU would have had to vouch for him to get the apartment. Perry would also allegedly have needed YUs permission to live off campus. Perry also allegedly received funding from YU to pay the rent on that apartment. The complaint asserts that all of these factors contribute to this rape being the responsibility of YU to handle as a Title IX case and follow proper procedure.

Additionally, the complaint alleges that after YU concluded its investigation and closed the case without having found Perry responsible, and without informing Plaintiff why the case was closed, Nissel allegedly refused to accept an appeal of that decision from Plaintiff despite her having the right to do so and Nissel having the responsibility to allow an appeal to be decided by somebody outside of the Title IX office. Plaintiff allegedly repeatedly tried requesting an appeal and was repeatedly denied by Nissel.

Following all of this, Plaintiff alleges that she requested certain security measures from the school to ensure her safety in the aftermath of the alleged rape. Plaintiff alleges that as time went on, Perry’s presence on campus caused her much fear and anxiety. According to the complaint, Nissel had a responsibility under Title IX to consider appropriate security measures both during and after the investigation to ensure the safety of Plaintiff. Among the options available to Nissel under Title IX were barring Perry from campus, barring Perry from certain areas on campus, barring Perry from certain areas on campus at certain times, removing Perry from the YU basketball team, and providing Plaintiff with escorts to accompany her while on campus. Nissel allegedly refused to afford Plaintiff any of these security measures despite Plaintiff repeatedly expressing her fear and anxiety about being on the same campus as her assailant.

According to the complaint, when Plaintiff once again requested security measures later that year she was told by Asher that by then there was too much bad blood to implement any security measures. Plaintiff alleges that YU refused to provide any security measures in retaliation for her having reported her rape.

Later that year, YU allegedly finally notified Plaintiff that her case had not been handled as a Title IX case because the rape took place off campus. However, the complaint points out that aside from YU’s security coverage of the area in which the rape took place, and aside from YUs role in security Perry’s housing for him, the YU Student Bill of Rights ensures that sexual assaults committed by students against other students, whether on or off campus, would be subject to a proper investigative process which was allegedly not followed in this case. Furthermore, the complaint cites the YU Anti Bullying and Hazing Policy for Students as saying that the policy applies to conduct that occurs off campus as well, if it determines that the behavior of the accused perpetrator impairs, obstructs, substantially interferes with or adversely affects the mission, process, or functions of the university. The YU Policy on Protecting Athletes similarly states that it applies, whether on or off campus, to any sexual harassment or assault.

The complaint then details numerous instances of YU policy requiring that it have applied a proper investigative process to this alleged assault regardless of where it happened.

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What was Rabbi Vinter Thinking? – Tzarich Iyun

In a recent article in the Haredi journal Tzarich Iyun, Rabbi Tzvi Vinter, in an article titled What They Call Love—Sexuality in Charedi Society, makes the argument that while the way Charedi society handles sexual abuse is bad and needs significant improvement, it’s good actually and miles ahead of what they goyim have. In the article he blames the hyperfocus on sexuality in secular society for the damage caused by sexual abuse, and then spends the latter half of his screed deflecting blame for society’s ills onto gay and trans people.

Writing an essay in response to this smorgasboard of stupidity would be a frustrating game of whack-a-mole with an inadequately sized mallet. Instead what this deserves is a good old fashioned fisking.

“Several sexual assault scandals within Charedi society, and specifically the Walder affair that left the community shellshocked, have led many to think we are now entering a “Charedi MeToo” era. On social media, at the very least, everyone seems to be bracing himself to see who will be outed next as a predator. The framing of the course correction on sexual assault as a “Charedi MeToo” may seem to be just trendy terminology; yet, words certainly matter, and they go a distance toward determining actual communal policy.”

The phrasing of his introductory paragraph foreshadows the attitude he’s about to present toward sexual abuse in the rest of his article. The idea that a mention of Chaim Walder and the idea that #MeToo has gone too far can exist in the same paragraph when to date there has yet to be systemic change of any kind to the Charedi approach to sexual abuse is tragic proof of the fact that those who bemoan #MeToo going too far generally bespeak the fact that it hasn’t gone far enough.  

“The MeToo movement is a feminist social movement interested in changing how men and women interact with one another in western society. It emerged from within a broader ideological framework centered on human rights, especially the right to equality. The MeToo movement seeks to write a new, more egalitarian contract governing the social treatment of men and women, and, more specifically, how men treat women.”

Listen, if the idea that people (women in particular since women comprise the majority of victims of sexual violence) are fed up with being sexually harassed and assaulted and are finally reclaiming some of the power robbed of them by their abusers and harassers is what passes for a feminist agenda in Rabbi Vinter’s mind I’m curious to know what he thinks about women having bank accounts or the right to vote.

More to the point, if his idea of a social contract is that half the population docilely accept being potential victims of sexual harassment and assault, I’d ask what he’s offering in kind for such a concession.

Even more to the point, Chaim Walder was by far not the first high-profile Charedi leader publicly accused of sexual abuse. The ongoing case against Malka Leifer, a woman principal of a girls school accused of sexually abusing multiple students, as well as numerous cases, including notably the cases against Yiddy and Yossi Kolko, Avraham Mondrowitz, and the many, many Child Victims Act cases filed against male and female abusers of boys and girls starkly underscore the fact that #MeToo in the Charedi community is not a “women’s issue” or “feminist agenda” but an effort to prevent male and female sexual abusers from abusing boys and girls in the community and getting away with it.

“Moreover, supporters of the movement claim that supplementing the formal, stringent procedures of criminal trials with the tools of popular protest is essential for promoting the just cause of women. Such procedures are simply too gradual and demanding, and what’s needed is broader social change right now. In addition, when it comes to harassment, it’s often hard to obtain testimony that is admissible in court. And who says criminal justice is the only species of justice out there? Social justice matters, too, and the process of improving norms includes changing behavioral patterns for which the criminal justice system is not the appropriate tool.”

Yes. And we claim this because the prevalence of sexual abuse is staggering, both in secular society and in the Orthodox community. But what’s worse about the problem in the Charedi world, without speculating about whether the prevalence rates there are higher, is the fact that while in secular society abuse and coverups happen with alarming frequency, in the aftermath of their exposure there are many resources available to survivors, and many well-funded organizations available to provide support, public education, and advocacy on behalf of the victims That’s not the case in the Charedi world, or in fact the Orthodox world.

In my ten years of advocacy on behalf of frum survivors of sexual abuse I’ve never come across a case of a Charedi victim reporting to police or suing their abuser and people/entities that enabled the abuse in civil court where the victim was provided any support by the community. The most the community will do if the survivor is lucky is not retaliate against them. So no, Rabbi Vinter, when the courtroom doors are only accessible through a gauntlet of rabbonim and askanim calling those who report moisrim, destroying the parnassah of their families, expelling their children from yeshivos, and ostracizing them from the community, it’s not enough to just theoretically have access to the courts. More needs to be done.

“The MeToo movement has met with many successes in recent years, as well as occasional backlashes. It has led to a lively public discussion of sexual assault and the proper relations between the sexes, and its reach has now extended even to the relatively cloistered Charedi community. Charedi “social activists” have taken it upon themselves to be the bearers of the “Charedi MeToo” message and change attitudes towards sexuality in Charedi society.”

Well yes, because the last coordinated Charedi response to the problem of sexual abuse was Agudah’s 2011 psak requiring that people ask permission of rabbonim before reporting sexual abuse. I’d say an attitude toward sexuality that requires permission before complying with state law and reporting suspected child sexual abuse is desperately in need of change. More recently the most prominent public response in the American Charedi print media to the Chaim Walder scandal were two articles in Mishpacha articles proposing batei din as the solution to the problem of sexual abuse. The need for a Charedi #MeToo movement couldn’t be more pressing.

“Unsurprisingly, calls for greater transparency and external involvement in addressing sexual assault are coupled with attempts to undermine traditional authorities. Our present leaders, the critics believe, have simply failed at their basic responsibility to protect the vulnerable and redress the grievances of victims.”

This is undeniably true.

“In addition, critics seek to change how accused parties are treated. If until now things were often just “cleared up” by Charedi leaders with an offender, now there’s a demand for legal authorities to become involved, for the offender’s actions to be strongly, publicly condemned, and for the community to sanction offenders more seriously.”

Yes. Rabbis are not qualified to investigate, adjudicate, or penalize sexual abuse. That’s what law enforcement and the civil and criminal courts are for.

“The way in which society treats sexual injustices derives from prior assumptions about sexuality’s place in human life. The secular public handles sexual assault as it does because of the enormous place that sexuality plays in human life. The increased interest in sexual harassment in western society is but only one aspect of sexuality’s centrality to western life, which is expressed in education, cinema, literature, and music. A person’s “sexual identity” is seen as one of the core characteristics of their personality. Indeed, the very concept of “sexual identity” expresses this new status of sexuality: sexuality becomes “identity,” something that defines a person’s essence.”

No it doesn’t. It derives from the fact that we now recognize the significant, often deadly toll that sexual abuse takes on its victims. Victims of sexual abuse are at increased risk of depression, eating disorders, addiction, anxiety disorders, self harm, problems with relationships and intimacy, and suicidal ideation. The harm is often compounded by the secondary trauma of having disclosed either to community members or leaders or law enforcement and either being disbelieved or receiving backlash for having disclosed.

Secular society now recognizes that which is why so many well-funded organizations exist to assist survivors of sexual violence in the aftermath of being abused. It’s why state after state in the United States is passing legislation to extend or eliminate criminal and civil statutes of limitations and open retroactive windows during which cases previously barred by insufficient civil statutes of limitations can be revived and brought in court.

Moreover, while Rabbi Vinter began his article discussing sexual assault of children, he now shifts to sexual harassment of adults. To head off his minimization of the issue of sexual harassment later in the article let me say that sexual harassment is not remotely just a secular issue. Orthodox women, even Charedi women face sexual harassment in the workplace, and Orthodox men, even Charedim, commit it.

The effects of sexual harassment on women in the workforce isn’t a function of one’s “sexual identity.” It’s harmful because it’s violative of a person’s body autonomy and sense of self. It’s harmful because sexuality is one of the most deeply personal parts of ourselves and sexual harassment is the act of someone else forcibly taking ownership of another person’s sexuality, fundamentally demonstrating to the victim that what they want doesn’t matter if it gratifies their harasser. That violation is why sexual harassment is a problem that secular society is beginning to take seriously, not because of new ideas on “sexual identity.”

“A dialogue of the deaf results. On the one hand, we find activists leading a charge for mending our mishandling of assault cases, often driven by an enormous sense of urgency. On the other hand is the broader Charedi community, which does not always understand what all the fuss is about. The latter is worthy of condemnation in the eyes of the former for its indifference and ostrich-like behavior, while the former group is often seen as a “pursuer” (rodef) in the eyes of the latter, with its zeal for condemning Charedi society as negligent at best and abusive at worst.”

First of all, many in the broader Charedi community do understand what all the fuss is about, they’re just so thoroughly disempowered by community leaders and rabbonim from doing anything about that they don’t bother trying. Secondly, of those who actually don’t understand what all the fuss is about, I would wager that the active fight against any kind of robust, best-practices based abuse prevention education curriculum in Charedi yeshivos, or even any direct and honest coverage of the issue in Charedi media outlets like Mishpacha, Ami, Hamodia, Yated, Binah, Zman, etc has something to do with it. Pointing to members of the Charedi community not understanding what the fuss is about as a reason to not challenge the Charedi approach to sexual abuse is like killing your parents and crying you’re an orphan.

Third, many rabbonim and gedolim have issued piskei halacha calling abuse pikuach nefesh and abusers rodfim and therefore allowing mesirah. Who is Rabbi Vinter to think he knows better?

“I do not claim here that Charedi handling of sexual assault is ideal. Far from it. Certainly, there is ample room for improving the handling of assault and our approach to sexuality in general.”

He could have stopped there, but there’s a ‘but’ coming.

Referring to the differences between secular and Charedi views on sexuality, Rabbi Vinter makes the case in the next few paragraphs that the primary difference between the two views is whether sexuality is viewed as something that is primarily serving an individual’s purpose and encouraged as a vehicle for personal fulfillment, or whether it is viewed as something driven by the evil inclination that is elevated by the limitations Charedi society places on it and the way it is instead focused externally on the building of a family and leading a spiritual and Halachic life.

“In western, secular society, a man whose life is filled and shaped by adapting to the norms of his family and whose success is constituted by forming a family as part of a community is engaging in self-denial for the sake of external social conventions. However, from the pre-modern perspective, which remains the situation even today for much of Charedi society, those conventions are part of what shapes a person’s “self.” Consideration of such matters is not a “sacrifice” for an external value and is obviously not a denial of our “self.” On the contrary, a person who leaves behind family and community norms in favor of an “inner authenticity” is considered a failure. The Charedi individual forms his sense of selfhood through affiliation with the community (among other things), an affiliation involving specific patterns of behavior and ways of life.”

He then lays out four main points on “liberal western society’s attitude to sexual assault:”

1) “The severity of the problem: There is a consensus that this is the most serious problem around, and that sexual assault, even when not amounting to rape, involves unbearable emotional harm with long-term consequences.”

Given how he’s framing this as a “western liberal” view vs a Charedi view, it’s baffling how this can be denied with a straight face. The effects of sexual assault of any kind, irrespective of whether or not it was penetrative, are well documented, both within and outside of the Charedi community. This misconception that penetration is somehow the dividing line between a legitimate trauma and an exaggerated overreaction worryingly pervades many modern halachic discussions regarding sexual assault.

On this point it’s important to understand that there is an important distinction between the actions of an abuser and the effect it has on the victim. Trauma responses are unpredictable. Some people are able to withstand years of horrific rape without later suffering debilitating psychological effects, and some people find themselves debilitated by PTSD in the aftermath of one assault, penetrative or not. That’s not a function of what precisely was done to the victim, there are many factors that comprise a person’s capacity for resilience following trauma. The “severity” of the act of abuse is rarely the determining factor in what the effect will be on the victim.  

2) “The definition of the problem: The scope of what counts as sexual assault is constantly being expanded. Today people even speak of “retroactive” harm, an experience of harm that arises when the situation is reconstructed at some later date.”

Yes, the scope of what “counts” as sexual assault is constantly being expanded. In previous generations only penetrative sexual assault was considered serious enough to warrant action. These days secular society at least recognizes that non penetrative incidents of sexual assault can be equally harmful. We also recognize non-contact incidents as sexual assault, for example, showing a child pornography, or exposing oneself to someone else without their consent.

In each of these examples, whether penetrative or non-contact, what causes the trauma is not the “severity” of the act but the fundamental violation of the personhood of the victim that causes the trauma.  

When referring to “retroactive harm” Rabbi Vinter is dismissing the lived experience of many survivors of abuse who despite living with the effects of what they experienced didn’t possess the language, either internally or externally, to name what happened to them. The reasons why survivors of abuse may not initially have the language to understand or explain what happened to them often stems from the fact that when the abuse happened they didn’t possess the language to describe what was happening. For example, children who don’t know what their or their abuser’s body parts are called or intended for may not be able to describe what happened to them, while still feeling and experiencing the effects of the violation entailed by the abuse.

Additionally, many survivors hear and see people around them dismissing experiences like theirs, blaming the victims, or minimizing the severity of it, and tell themselves that the pain they feel is the result of something wrong about themselves rather than the result of the sexual abuse they experienced.  

3) “Level of containment: Sexual assault is considered a crime that cannot be contained. Any means necessary must be deployed against offenders to prevent them from causing future harm, including harming their livelihood, name, and family. A sex offender receives the least forgiveness and empathy of any criminal, even murderers.”

Yes. The damage they cause is actually tremendous, not just to the victims but to the communities and families around them. In many cases the damage spans generations with the trauma of a parent who was abused as a child manifests in the raising of their own children. Furthermore, sexual abusers often have dozens of victims over the course of their lives and the devastation caused both directly and indirectly ripples throughout the community.

4) “Intensity of the struggle: In light of the above, the common approach is that an uncompromising war must be fought against sexual crimes, even at high costs. The morality against sex crimes is a morality of war that justifies such collateral casualties as family members, mistaken identification, and so on.”

This is a common weapon employed against those seeking justice for survivors of abuse, that in doing so we unfairly damage the families of abusers who shouldn’t be collectively punished for the actions of one person. In employing this argument against survivors and advocates working on their behalf Rabbi Vinter is attempting to shift blame from where it belongs to the people working to solve the problem.

Sexual abuse is a crime which affects not only the victim but their family, friends, loved ones, and community. The blame for that damage lies squarely at the feet of the abuser and nobody else. Similarly, the families of abusers suffer as a result of the actions of the abuser. The blame for that also lies squarely at the feet of the abuser. In committing an act of abuse they not only harm the victim and all the people in their sphere, they harm their own families. The idea that we should allow abusers to avoid justice by using their families as human shields is despicable.  

He then slips in a mention of “mistaken identities” as though this is a common problem. It’s not, and I would defy Rabbi Vinter to publicly identify 3 examples of this happening. “Mistaken identity” is a euphemism for false report. False reports are exceedingly rare. It’s even rarer for a false report to progress to the point of arrest or filing of a civil case. It’s even rarer for a false report to result in a conviction or judgment, and I would defy Rabbi Vinter to publicly identify 3 examples of false reports.

Charedi leaders often point to the trumped up idea of false reports when discussing sexual abuse because it allows them the latitude they need to deny the validity of any individual case. This is a problem I often refer to as Schrodinger’s Sexual Abuse: Sexual abuse is simultaneously a very serious problem that happens alarmingly often and that we therefore need to take serious measures to prevent and address, and also a problem that seemingly doesn’t exist because this case is a lie because the victim suffers from drug addiction, and this case is a lie because the girl was promiscuous, and this case is a lie because the abuser is prominent, and so on.

As long as the community can perpetuate the idea that false cases are common they can get away with labelling every case they’d prefer to ignore as false. To hear them tell it the incidence rate of false reports would be 95%.

“Halachic requirements alone require concealment of sexuality and its restriction to very limited times and places. For a person living a life of holiness and purity, following all rules and strictures of halacha, sexuality will necessarily occupy a limited part of his life. Sexuality is thus seen as something that should not be neglected, but not as critical to a person’s basic personality. As noted, this is not due to a neglect of the “good life” but rather a different understanding of personhood, in which sexuality occupies a much less important place in the formation of the self.

The attitude toward sexual assault in the Charedi space derives from the Charedi approach to sexuality outlined above.”

Oh really!? Then why does my organization regularly receive calls from Charedim who were sexually abused asking us for help finding inpatient and intensive outpatient treatment for trauma? And why do we get calls from Charedi women asking us for help after being raped by their husbands? And why is the demand for funding for trauma therapy so much higher than the funding available? Why do we have support groups full of Charedi men and women who were sexually abused and for years haven’t been able to heal from the trauma? If the outlook on sexuality in the Charedi community is so much more suited to helping survivors recover from the trauma of sexual abuse, why do we consistently find that the Charedi cases we handle are often more emergent that cases from more leftward sects or denominations?

“I do not deny that there are shameful coverups and improperly handled cases, and these need addressing.”

There’s another ‘but’ coming.

“But it is essential, even in considering how to address the severe issues that require attention, to understand the underlying attitude, which derives from the fact that sexuality lacks a formative role in shaping us. Even sexual crimes are not seen as something special. I believe this is why sexual crimes are not seen as being more heinous than other severe injustices, and why dealing with them is not considered a top social priority.”

Perhaps sexual crimes aren’t seen as “special” (read: not worthy of taking seriously) to Rabbi Vinter’s mind, but speaking as someone born, raised, and sexually abused in Boro Park, the fact that I and my family were Charedi didn’t lessen the damage my abuser caused me. The PTSD I experience wasn’t lessened by the fact that the people around me had a pre-modern approach to sexuality. I was a child and had no concept of sexuality, liberal Western or premodern, and I still managed to be hurt by the abuse I experienced.

Rabbi Vinter can believe whatever he wants, but his opinions are based not in fact but in ignorance. Sexual abuse isn’t harmful because of a Western liberal sexual ethic, it’s harmful because violating another person—especially a child—sexually is harmful. Rabbi Vinter also admits more than perhaps he realizes when he concedes that dealing with sexual crimes isn’t considered a top social priority. His ignorance, which is alarmingly common in the Charedi community, is an outgrowth not of the fact that sexuality and everything connected to it isn’t actually important to Charedim, but because Charedi leadership actively prevents any public discussion about sexual abuse from taking place in its press, and any best practices based education about sexual abuse and child safety from being taught in the community.

He is a perfect exemplar of the problem he thinks doesn’t exist, a pristine demonstration of the Dunning-Kreuger effect in action. He doesn’t know what he doesn’t know because his community has kept the relevant information from him.

“The existing consensus in the west regarding the severity, the urgency, and the importance of handling sexual assault does not exist among Charedim.”

Too true, unfortunately.

“This is not because Charedim don’t care about women or are insensitive to the suffering of the weak, but because sexuality has traditionally been somewhere on the spectrum between a “human necessity” and a “low and base necessity.”’

He had it half right in the first clause of that sentence, but not for the reason he cites. I don’t think it’s fair to say that Charedim don’t care about women or the suffering of the weak, but I think it’s pretty obvious that in a community where it’s taboo to even name the problem of sexual abuse it’s going to be very difficult to get people to take the issue seriously.

“As such, sexual assault is not considered a special attack on human dignity but is instead akin to other forms of cruelty.”

But it is, and it should be considered a special attack on human dignity. There’s a reason, for example, that rape as a weapon of war is considered more of a crime than collateral damage. It’s because the weaponization of sexuality to violate victims actually causes more harm than physical injury. But what’s even more shocking is the fact that he in the same breath flippantly dismisses other forms of cruelty. If sexual abuse is considered akin to other forms of cruelty either Rabbi Vinter is admitting that he doesn’t care about those either, or that sexual abuse should be taken very seriously.

“The different conception of the severity of sexual assault leads to a relative diminishment of the sanctions applied to perpetrators. Charedim do not view sexual crimes as uniquely reprehensible, and so are not willing to pay uniquely high costs to redress them.”

The fact that he readily admits that out loud is more damning than he realizes, and the fact that he isn’t embarrassed to do that is alarming. The fact that an article with such a shocking admission was published reflects very poorly on this publication and on the community he claims to represent. He should be denounced by Charedi leadership if for no other reason than the fact that it makes them seem monstrous.

“In the struggle against sexual assault, broader considerations are made of the costs of punishing offenders (innocent accused parties are likely to be caught up), of preventing future harm (trusting relationships are harder to form if people are taught to see themselves foremost as potential victims), of sex education (which can undermine accepted modesty standards), and so on.”

Rabbi Vinter should call any of the nonprofit leaders who serve survivors of sexual abuse in the Orthodox community and ask them how many survivors they know who have died by suicide or who struggle every day to stay alive as a result of their trauma. Perhaps then he’d appreciate the fact that sexual abuse is pikuach nefesh. Hashem gave us the Torah and in it 613 mitzvos, and commanded us to violate 610 of them to preserve life. Rabbi Vinter is apparently frummer than Hashem himself.

“Moreover, sexual assault is not automatically considered justification for destroying a person’s public standing.”

Again, this is a shocking and monstrous admission that should embarrass anyone in Charedi leadership who reads this.

“For many liberal outsiders of Charedi society, all of this is anathema.”

Oh yes, those immoral liberals and their caring about victims of sexual abuse.

“But for those on the inside, especially those who are older and less familiar with modern values, it is almost obvious.”

It’s not. They suffer silently because they know that if they dare to speak up people like Rabbi Vinter will punish them for doing so.

“But what of the victims? If we are a good society, how can we be so uncaring toward the suffering of victims of sexual assault?”

The fact that he’s self aware enough to ask this question makes this pile of drek so much worse.

“While I do not take this question lightly, and it is more than possible that some internal-Charedi reform is in order, I want to raise—with requisite caution—the following thought. It is possible that the centrality of sexual identity in liberal society raises the likelihood that victims will see themselves as defined by the experience of sexual assault. This, in turn, will also impact the level of pain and suffering, especially for cases of assault and harassment far from the extreme side of the spectrum, and will make the process of rehabilitation that much harder.”

This too is an unfortunately common misconception, that the suffering caused by sexual abuse is caused not by the abuse itself but from third parties telling victims that they should feel traumatized. Not a single person who works in survivor advocacy wants survivors to feel more traumatized. To the contrary, we spend a lot of time and money helping survivors overcome trauma and thrive in the aftermath of sexual abuse. This attitude is a dangerous canard employed cynically in an attempt to delegitimize therapy and best-practices based responses to sexual abuse.

We regularly receive calls from people who were sexually abused as children, never left the community, never told anybody, built lives for themselves with spouses and children, and are years later feeling the effects of the trauma they experienced forcing its way to the surface. Sexual abuse is harmful because sexual abuse is harmful, not because someone told the victim that they should feel harmed.

“We are used to the statement whereby “we are more aware today of the deep and unrepairable damage of sexual assault,” and there is room to ask: Is this only because of heightened awareness and sensitivity that our ancestors did not possess, or does our newly-found knowledge also derive from the modern emphasis on sexuality as defining to selfhood?”

This entire article is an exercise in begging the question.

“If less value is placed on sexuality, then less of a person’s inner self is perceived as having been injured by sexual assault, and the process of rehabilitation becomes, perhaps, somewhat less arduous.”

Reality doesn’t bear out this wild assumption.

“The takeaway from this article is that collectively accusing an entire public of being deniers and insensitive is not beneficial and, more importantly, is incorrect.”

No, Rabbi Vinter, you spent this whole article telling the world that Charedim don’t care. Don’t put that on those of us trying to fix the problem and help survivors.

“Moreover, adopting the language and form of liberal society’s handling of sexual assault involves the internalizing of western sexual mores and human self-conception, something which is not necessarily desirable within Charedi society.”

What he means to say here is that in order to properly address the issue of sexual abuse we need to frankly discuss the problem using correct terminology, and we need to educate children, parents, and teachers in children’s body autonomy, respecting children’s boundaries, believing them when they say that they feel unsafe, learning how to recognize the red flags indicating sexual abuse, and how to properly report it to the authorities, and that’s more than he can personally tolerate.  Because of that he feels comfortable sacrificing however many children it takes to maintain this illusion of a community that doesn’t have a sexual abuse problem.  Perhaps he should be compelled to visit the shivas of parents whose children have died by suicide and after sitting with enough of them and really listening perhaps he’ll regain his capacity for empathy.

“Proper handling of the issue of sexual assault within the community should be done out of an awareness and understanding of the Charedi conception of sexuality.”

No, Rabbi Vinter, it should be done in whatever way best protects children and saves lives.

“If we decide that we want to change our conception of sexuality itself, and accept the liberal understanding thereof, then we need to say so explicitly. If we respect the traditional Charedi approach and do not wish to dramatically change it, we need to accept that handling assault will be neither as totalizing nor as dramatic as it is among the general public.”

Finally, on this point we agree. The choice is this: Either the community and its leadership accept the fact that its handling of sexual abuse thus far is inadequate, harmful, and costs the lives of Charedi children, or Charedi leadership can continue covering up and enabling abuse, ostracizing victims, and supporting abusers, and sit upon the piles of dead Charedi children proudly patting each other on the back for at least not being liberal.

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A Response to JOFA’s Statement on Their Sexual Harassment Scandal

Earlier today JOFA released a statement by their board president, Pam Scheininger. Here’s my response.

This statement is nothing but a pack of lies.


Firstly, what does mutual mean in the context of the situation? How could there be a truly mutual decision when one side is firing the other for reporting sexual harassment and making severance contingent on the NDA? That’s not mutual, that’s an incredible imbalance of power. An employee, after experiencing serious sexual harassment and retaliation for reporting, is being fired and given a choice between getting fired with nothing and getting fired with severance is going to choose severance, and you know that. That doesn’t make it any more mutual than its a mutual decision between a mugger and their victim to hand over their wallet and phone.


Second, that investigation was garbage and JOFA knows it. Neither of the women were contacted as part of the investigation, and the reason JOFA thought they could get away with that was because of the NDAs each had been forced to sign. But since they mention the investigation, why not release the report so we can all see what the investigation actually consisted of, who the investigators were, and how they reached their decision?


Third, JOFA absolutely knew about the second (actually first chronologically) victim seeing as they had fired her with an NDA the day she reported her harassment to the board.


Fourth, the policy JOFA adopted in 2019 was laughable. It was boilerplate. There was absolutely no effort put into it at all despite being well aware of available resources for actually crafting an anti-harassment policy to address what had actually happened at JOFA. Throwing up a boilerplate harassment policy and placing all responsibility for solving the problem on victims reporting is less than meaningless considering JOFA’s history of firing sexual harassment victims for reporting.


Fifth, JOFA really shouldn’t be bragging about joining SRE seeing as they were kicked out for being malfeasant and refusing to comply with SRE’s new NDA policy.


Sixth, JOFA can’t with a straight face claim it naively didn’t know that NDAs were improper practice. When the second NDA was issued, New York State was actively in the process of banning their use precisely because they were instruments of coverup in sexual harassment case. JOFA can’t honestly claim to be a feminist organization while also claiming they don’t know how NDAs are used to silence victims of sexual harassment.


Seventh, JOFA touting it’s “good work” is like asking Mary Todd Lincoln how she enjoyed the play. It has always been my operating principle that the second an institution becomes more important than the people it serves it no longer deserves to exist. That’s what happened here. JOFA the institution became more important than the women it served. The second they covered up sexual harassment and forced employees into a nondisclosure agreement they lost your right to exist. Their other work means nothing in light of what they did here.


Finally, the members of the board at the time who were complicit in this coverup don’t get to just walk away from this. Every single one of them who were on the board at the time should resign in disgrace.

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A Day in the Life of Anti-Abuse Advocacy

Author’s note: The context to this post can be found here.

I typically don’t share things people send me because I respect their confidentiality, but in this case I’m making an exception to give you all a brief look behind the curtain of the insanity that this work pretty regularly entails.

After posting the summary of the case against Daniel Dresdner, I started getting calls from people asking me to take the post down. I didn’t understand, they’d tell me, the alleged victims were [insert derogatory bullshit here], and while they respect the work I do, in *this* case I was wrong and should take it down. I was also told I was ruining the life of a good man by summarily declaring him guilty without investigating the claims myself.

I explained, as I do every time I get this wholly unoriginal type of call, that neither I nor ZA’AKAH is qualified to do investigations or make determinations of guilt or innocence, which is why we only post public information we believe to be in the public interest, and present it neutrally without giving our opinions on guilt or innocence.

Without fail, every single one of these self-deluded cheppenyaks that call me think they’re the only one to ever have such a conversation with me, despite the fact that in nearly every case I post I get at least a few calls from people telling me that I do important work but in this case I have my head up my ass. As if *their* alleged rapist is different than all the other alleged rapists.

Anyway, At some point Yehuda Dresdner, alleged rapist Daniel Dresdner’s brother, calls me and has this conversation with me. I explain to him the same thing I explain to everyone else, and tell him that the only way that post is coming down is if the court makes a definitive finding of falsehood in the case. First he tried telling me he had evidence to share that would show that the allegations were false. I told him that if he had such evidence he should have his brother’s lawyer present it in court. Then he threatened to have me sued if I didn’t take the post down, to which I responded by offering to give him my attorney’s contact information so he could more easily send the lawsuit.

Then he asked if he could email me, and I told him that while I couldn’t give him what he wanted he was welcome to email me.

This is what he sent:

Please read this letter in it’s entirety. And I would appreciate this letter be shown to the board you mentioned earlier today. This letter is not meant to pressure anyone. It is to have a dialogue and to educate. And hopefully enlighten.

My intentions in writing this letter is not to make light of, in any way shape or form, the pain, agony and shame survivors of sexual abuse must endure not only during their experience but for many years to come and possibly (most probably) even for the rest of their life. No, in fact, my intentions are quite the contrary. Up until recently I had never heard of your organization.

However, based on what I have been reading and watching on your Facebook page, twitter account etc. the goal of your organization seems to be pretty clear and straightforward. To stand up and give a voice to the many people who have been sexually molested and abused in the Jewish community. To help and assist the most vulnerable who have no one to turn to. In short, to support those who have been grossly wronged and to make sure innocent people do not get raped and thrown to the side (figuratively and literally).

Which brings me to my main point. It seems like to me that in your great desire to help those who desperately need help you in fact are also opening the door to those who seek to harm others. I was told very clearly that Zaakah’s policy is to post information on their Facebook page once a lawsuit has been filed WITHOUT EVEN ONCE reaching out to the one who is being accused. And a couple of reasons were provided as a means to explain these actions. But ultimately you are providing a platform for anyone who’d like to go damage other individuals.

It is incomprehensible that you would post such damaging information about an individual without delving into all the information that can be provided from all parties involved. In other words, you do not seem to care about what is true and what is false. And that really is the bottom line in any case. You have unnecessarily caused immense pain and embarrassment to my brother, his wife, my parents etc. And here is the part I simply do not understand. If you truly are interested in helping victims WHY WOULD YOU FACILITATE BASELESS ATTACKS ON INNOCENT PEOPLE ?!

And although you have told me on both of our phone calls that you are simply posting public information it is quite clear in the way the woman reads the allegations on your TikTok page and in the way the matter is presented on all of your social media platforms that you believe these allegations must have teeth to it otherwise it would not have gotten to the legal standpoint it has currently reached. Which is ridiculous because to be honest, anyone can sue anyone or press charges in this country. It really is not a difficult action to get done. A conviction by the courts etc is a whole different level but you do not wait for such actions to occur.

The fact of the matter is that you and I both were not witness to any of the alleged actions mentioned in the lawsuit. Is it possible that they have fabricated many lies in order to smear the reputation and to cause pain to someone who they simply do not like for various other reasons? You must agree that it is a possibility. And I believe it’s the reality. We have been dealing with [redacted], long before the lawsuit and long before Zaakah stuck it’s nose into the matter. And if you take just a little time and do some research on this story you will realize that you are being used…Why would an organization who claims to want to help people go and hurt someone?! And without even giving them a chance to explain and say over their part of the story?!

The only possible conclusion that I can come up with is that you are so embroiled in your own personal pain from your own life experiences causing you to lash out and take a stance at anyone in any situation where someone rises up and screams that they were sexually attacked etc. without actually understanding the many other possible scenarios driving the accusations. I very much understand why you do what you do. However what I do not understand is how you stoop to such a level of hurting innocent people along the way.

If you really don’t know what happened and you post things in a way that indicates that it is more fact than fiction how do you live with yourself? Really, how do you justify hurting some people in some instances in order to help those in other instances. You have a crooked policy of jumping right into something without bothering to learn the facts and if you hit the mark some of the time so then it’s all worth it to you. Is that really how you operate?? It’s terrible. I implore you to take down the Facebook post and any social media post and video about my brother. But not only should you take all of this down but you should issue a public apology for doing what you did.

Will it help fix the undeserved damage you caused? Probably not. But it will bring some comfort in knowing that you actually stand by your principles that all people should be protected. Should you continue to support these two women privately? I don’t know, if you actually believe them go for it. It will be wasted time that you could use for more productive actions but that would be your choice.

This entire matter will eventually be dropped and legal action will be taken against them [redacted]. But at least acknowledge that we are talking about one (or two) adult married women who [redacted]. Innocent until proven guilty are not just cute words. It actually has some truth to it and in this case you have actually taken the side of the aggressor not the victim!

People should be protected and represented when sexually abused. But we should not just run with it on a public platform if it is just one person’s word against another. It not only makes no sense to do that, it is downright wrong. Looking forward to hearing back from you…

Yehuda Dresdner

———————————-

So in short, nothing of substance.

He followed it up with this:

The least you can do is acknowledge that you received the email. I don’t have high hopes that you will do anything differently because for whatever reason you march to your own beat and absolutely do not care at all about separating truth from fiction. If you did you would have realized that two adults in a dispute happening in real time might have something else going on as opposed to an adult accusing someone about something done many years ago when they were a child etc (not that I agree with what you do in those cases either). When you are dealing with a case in real time like this it really is easy to investigate just a bit.

The only one who does not do so are those who do not care about the truth. In essence you have now become exactly like all the major organizations you rally against. Because in this case you took the side of [redacted] and they go up against my brother who in this case is on his own.

Don’t worry this will be my last email regardless if you respond. To be clear I just view you as a messenger. No one can do any damage unless Gd will it. And whatever has been done with your posts etc has already been done. You’re not the real issue anymore but I just figured I’d just send one last email letting you know that the good work you do does not justify at all the terrible thing you have done.

——————————————–

It wasn’t, in fact, the last email he sent.

Some context to the next one. His alleged rapist brother had a court hearing on 4/7 and I took time out of my very busy day to go be in the gallery. Someone I believe was Yehuda Dresdner showed up, but left when he saw me there. This was the email I received a few hours later:

You are a horribly terrible person

——————————————–

Next morning I get a call from Yehuda asking me why I wasn’t acknowledging receipt of his emails. I told him that nothing constructive had been sent so I had chosen to ignore it. I may have also cursed at him a bunch for interrupting my morning with his nonsense.

Not taking the hint, he called me back. I asked him to pause so I could turn on my call recorder for the purpose of having what to send to the plaintiff’s attorneys. Politely he obliged. He then launched back into his bullshit, so I cursed at him again and hung up.

He then called back again and left the voicemail linked below, and followed it up with this email:

Subject: ASHER PLEASE ANSWER

Hah you get worked up when a random person writes in an email that you are a horrible person. For someone in your position I’m surprised that you have such a low self esteem that one little comment gets you so roiled up. And you are the person who bashes lots of other people without any proof and send people to harras others?! If you need I know of many therapists that can help you get through the trauma that is causing you to act the way you do.

Not that I care to help you but I figure if you get some help you will stop trying to destroy others people’s lives for no reason other than to strike your small little ego. It’s great that you recorded our phone call, maybe you can send it to me so that I can play it for a lawer and charge you with harassment and threatening comments etc.

——————————————-

Gotta say that last email had strong DEBATE ME YOU COWARD energy. Here’s the funniest bit, two hours after he sent me the first email his alleged rapist brother was arrested on 55 counts of criminal sexual abuse in the third degree. He had no idea that was coming when he sent that email. I did, though, which made that first email all the ridiculous.

Anyway, here’s the voicemail he left me.

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SRE Network Takes Small Step Toward Fixing Malfeasant Member Problem

Following yesterday’s post about SRE Network and their malfeasant member organization, they released an updated statement and policy recommendation on NDAs (linked below). While this is a good start, the work isn’t done, and I don’t believe SRE has done enough yet.


To SRE leadership:


A few primary points I think still need to be addressed, especially in light of this member that has been actively malfeasant, lied to SRE leadership about the extent of the harassment they enabled, and continued to promote the perpetrator on several occasions.


1) There needs to be an acknowledged difference between an institution that has in the distant past been malfeasant and has joined in good faith to gain access to experts and resources that can help bring them in line with best practices, and organizations like this member organization that have very recently been malfeasant, and whose malfeasance is ongoing.


2) Your policy recommendations on past nondisclosure agreements are not good enough. The commitment should be public, so they can be held publicly accountable should they attempt to later enforce the nondisclosure agreement.


3) Your policy is vague on what constitute appropriate channels. Appropriate channels for disclosing sexual harassment or abuse are whatever channels the victim deems appropriate. The public voiding of the NDAs should be unequivocal and unconditional. It’s not for the malfeasant organization to determine what is and isn’t an appropriate channel for the disclosure of sexual harassment or abuse.


4) Your member page is very vague on what membership in SRE entails with respect to what SRE membership does and doesn’t mean for member organizations, particularly the fact that clearly SRE membership in no way guarantees even any sort of commitment to compliance with policy recommendations, and with respect to what SRE expects of its members. Whether you intend it to or not, this results in the impression that SRE membership is an acknowledgement of of a member organization’s safety, which as you said in this statement is not the case. This should be very clearly and explicitly corrected on your membership page.


5) There needs to be a procedure for removing members from the network. You can claim until you’re blue in the face that the goal is to encourage members, however malfeasant, into compliance, but at some point allowing the membership of a malfeasant organization that resists any sort of meaningful compliance is not only harmful to the image of SRE, and not only reflects poorly on other member organizations and SRE advisors, but actively hurts the people harmed by the member organization’s malfeasance. There has to be a limit after which a member is expelled. There needs to be a process and procedure for removing malfeasant members. It’s unreasonable and embarrassing to run a network committed to safety respect and equity where any member can flout the recommendations and continue to retain membership.


I look forward to seeing these issues corrected in the very near future.

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